I *love* silicone dildos—from the best dual-density silicone to squishy-soft single-density silicone. After all, silicone dildos are the only body-safe sex toys that can feel soft (or very hard!). If you want a penis-like feel in your sex toy—or you want an abstract dildo that’s soft but not floppy—then a dual-density dildo is the way to go. (But be sure it’s dual-density silicone, because there are also dual layer dildos made from unsafe TPE and PVC.)
Finding my favorite silicone toys was a trial-and-error process, because silicone blends do vary so much. After lots of testing, I wrote this dildo firmness guide to help you figure out how soft or hard various brands of silicone dildos are—and hopefully, which might work best for you. I update this guide with new silicone dildo releases: last update January 2021!
Skip ahead to the comparative “squish lists”: the Dual-Density Dildos guide for the unique feel of a two-layer toy, or the Single-Density Dildos section for everything else. And if price is a big factor for you, also check out my list of places to find affordable silicone sex toys.
Contents
Squish Matters
Quality platinum-cured silicone is a beautiful material for sex toys because:
- It’s functionally nonporous and hydrophobic, meaning that it naturally protects against bacterial growth (unlike less-safe materials including TPR/TPE, PVC, latex, “rubber,” and “jelly”).
- It can be fully sanitized—killing all bacteria and microorganisms—because it’s very chemically stable and resistant to high temperatures. That makes it safe to use for years at a time, and after sanitizing a toy, you can use it vaginally after having used it anally or use it with a different partner.1
- It can be soft! Softer silicone toys include more dimethicone (polydimethylsiloxane, or PDMS)—basically, silicone oil. “Softness” might seem like a strange quality to be looking for in an artificial erection, but materials like stainless steel, wood, ceramic, and plastic have no hopes of feeling lifelike, ever—and toys made of these hard materials are often uncomfortable for the more sensitive toy user.
That’s why I believe every new dildo-buyer should know that silicone toys vary in so many ways: not just in size and shape, but in firmness. This toy guide was written to help you find the best density dildo for you.
Dildo hardness can be measured on a scale called shore durometer. Smooth-On, the leading US silicone manufacturer, has a helpful graphic on this page that compares three different shore durometer scales, two of which (00 and A) are used to grade sex toys:
- 00-20 through 00-50 is extremely soft. 00-20 is usually only for penis masturbation sleeves, 00-30 is very soft for dildos, and 00-50 is a popular squishy firmness for fantasy dildos.
- 1A to 8A range from squishy to still fairly soft.
- 10A is soft(ish) for sex toys; 15A is starting to get firmer. 20A is somewhat hard, especially when used on sensitive erogenous zones.
- The graphic still labels 30A as soft too, but that’s soft for industrial use; 40A is “medium soft,” as per Smooth-On. But 40A doesn’t feel too much different from glass when it’s pounding you.
Knowing a toy’s shore strength can give you some idea of how it’ll feel inside you before you buy. But it’s not an absolute guarantee of how the toy will feel for your body, because (1) individual sensitivity differs, and (2) other factors can affect the final hardness of platinum-cured silicone—especially the size of the toy. (The larger a toy in the same silicone blend, the firmer it’ll feel overall.)
The Squish Lists
Dual-Density Dildos
Dual-density dildos create a more penis-like effect through their two layers of silicone: a soft outer layer hugging a firm inner core. All the best realistic dildos are two layered: That way, the toy can be yielding (more like flesh) but not bend backward when you’re really pounding it.
My top-recommended dual-density 100% silicone toys, followed by a list from soft to firm!
- A. Best affordable: Neo Elite 7.5 Dildo with Balls ($34.99; good for G-spot/prostate) or Neo Elite 7.5 ($31.99; choose for its length, for gentle insertion, and/or for easy anal play)
- B. Best skin-like texture: BMS Naked Addiction Dual Density ($59.99)
- C. Best for G-spot / prostate: Uberrime Splendid ($109-$114; slightly more impact); VixSkin Mustang ($136; a classic fan favorite)
- D. Best smaller dildo: VixSkin Spur for really petite ($82.00); Avant Ergo Mini for thinner than “average” ($34.99)
- E. Best big dildo!: Luminous Stud ($49.99; awesome for hands free solo play); VixSkin Outlaw or Maverick ($134 / $119)
From softest to firmest feel, here’s my updated list of dual density silicone dildos. (Note that if you’re looking for XL toys, these generally max out at “kinda big,” so skip down to the softest single-density below for truly huge dildos.) All are strap on / harness compatible and easy to clean platinum silicone. ⬇️⬇️
- THE KING of dual-density dildos, VixSkin, by Vixen Creations: The VixSkin Mustang has almost a cult following for its squishy G-spot / prostate massage goodness—the head is so very soft, but protruding with a very curved shaft. The outer layer of VixSkin is luxuriously squishy, around the feel of the soft (00-30) options from many fantasy toy makers. VixSkin dils are sticky, but with lube, the shafts feel incredibly smooth and glide easily. If you like realism but don’t like much texture, then VixSkin is really the best.
- My favorite realistic-skin-feel toy: BMS Naked Addiction Dual Density Dildo is pretty damn lifelike, and the silicone finish is outstanding: neither too slick nor too draggy. A good balance, like dual-density is meant to be. I think this dildo feels better in my hand than VixSkin, and pretty amazing in my vag too. Also, the suction cup works well! I truly wish this toy came in different colors, shapes, and sizes too—and with a bigger head for more G-spot (/prostate) massage.
- Glow in the Dark softness: Luminous dildos by Evolved have a sweet realistic feel (once you add water based lube, or hybrid lube!). The Stud is my favorite BIG-headed dual density dildo, for thick G-spot play—it’s delicious to pound against the wall. There’s also an average size and a short Luminous too! I love the average (6 inches insert length) as well. These are tied with Naked Addiction #5, below) as my personal favorite realistics for under $100, and have a strong suction cup. All glow light blue in the dark after you charge them in sunlight / LED light first: the really cool part is being able to see through the clear silicone outside.
- Artisan goodness: The Uberrime Splendid Dual-Density Dildo now comes in three sizes—all handmade by an independent artist in the US. Full comparison here: the medium sized Splendid dual is a favorite. This is very much a G-spot or prostate toy: if you’re wanting a straighter feel, check out Uberrime’s other dual-density dildos, with Teres, Primo, and Maxime, being the most realistic (more detail here) for more variety.
- Classic shapes at a low price: The two NS Colours Dual Density Silicone dongs2 are realistic toys that are as affordable as Blush Neo Elite & Luminous dual-density, but are available in “flesh” tones. Colours Dual Density silicone is squishy outside, with lots of vein texture; and its stickiness requires a good bit of lube, IMO. The Colours Dual suction cups are good.
- Best nonrealistic / pegging dildos: Blush Novelties’ Real Nude-Avant dual-density dildos are even smushier than Blush’s Neo Elite toys, plus very slick. Avant Ergo & Suko have a very firm core that doesn’t bend with thrusting. (Ergo Mini is a lil more flexible.) These toys were formerly part of Blush’s Real Nude line, but were moved into the Avant collection as D7–D12: exact same dildos, marginally different names.
- Pleasure Works Firm Core Silicone dildos are, IMO, easy to overlook in the sea of dual density, but they’re solid enough toys. Siren Vibrating is one of the few non-phallic duals, with a G-spotty head. See my Cadet Vibrating review here.
- Best affordable realistics: Blush Neo Elite is now my top general recommendation; they’re a great balance of soft and firm, and they go for about $30 each. See my comparison of all 4 models here. And they have new glow-in-the-dark ones that light up like crazy when you stick ’em in sunlight first!!!
- Posable dual-density: The Strap-On-Me Dual-Density Bendable Dildo is 3 layers of material: that’s dual-density silicone with a bendable core in the center. Great for intro pegging, as reviewed here. Read more about posable/bendable cored silicone dils in this guide.
- Classic dual-density: Tantus O2 less-phallic dildos: This means the Tantus Cush O2 and Tantus Flurry! The Cush has a much squashier head than my Tantus realistics, and a smoother finish too. (Damn close to the Uberrime above, in fact.) Tantus was one of the first dual-density silicone makers and has a 20-year history of producing premium bodysafe silicone.
- 💡 Neo Elite Glow! The Neo Elite Glow toys (2 models) are slightly firmer than original Neo Elite, and you can see through the soft silicone to the core underneath—very cool. These glow really well after you let ’em sit on a windowsill / in light first.
- Most grabby skin lines: Tantus O2 realistic dildos are on the firmer side, especially the bullet-vibe-compatible Sam, Duchess, and Alan (review here). Of the non-vibrating realistics, next-firmest is Uncut #1, my dual-density dildo awakening, whose outer layer of silicone measures up to 10A shore; while Gary is a much-softer 5A. The Tantus O2 realistics have a grabby finish that adds some friction—which I love but some people find abrupt.
But do you want *MORE*??? Triple-density silicone is now a thing! Triple-layer dildos have a third “skin” layer that covers the fleshy layer and the erect core underneath. This can feel either more or less realistic than a dual-density dildo, depending on how the 3 layers are balanced.
Single-Density Dildos
Single-density silicone is what it sounds like: one layer of silicone (all the same firmness) makes up the whole toy. Here’s a listing of the toy firmnesses I have accurate information about (from the manufacturers themselves and usually from personal experience):
First my personal favorite category: softer silicone dildos. Squish demo of the semi-soft to soft toys here, and of really soft options here. As always, bodysafe silicone only! Bullet points run from SOFTEST to HARDEST in this section.
Soft Squishy Dildos
- The softest (nonpenetrable) fantasy toys are made from the squashy 00-30 silicone.3 See: Uberrime will custom-make any dildo in “Soft & Squishy Shore 0030” now in all listings that are not “ready-made” (premade) or dual-density, as found in the Ardor Dragon; plus Mr. Hankey’s Toys has it as “40% Soft,” selectable Firmness in each listing. These toys are the perfect example of squish! I would recommend this density most for THICK toys (2 inches diameter plus), or very textured ones. The flexibility feels kinda flaccid to me, floppy, in toys below 1.8 inches diameter. If you’re very sensitive to texture or want to buy an extra-large toy that isn’t painful, this will be your best option. Most big-toy-fans will agree: XL toys are most comfortable in extra-soft silicone.
- SquarePegToys®’s SuperSoft Bronze, Graphite, & Chestnut dildos are so frickin’ meaty. They can really trick your brain into thinking you’re screwing a dick. I have a love affair with Nathan (smol) in particular because it has the most true-to-life skin textures. SquarePegToys was the first maker of truly SOFT 100% plat. silicone dildos, so they deserve mad respect for that. The SuperSoft density is most likely 00-40 (details in my Egg Plug review). That means that even the BIG sizes of SquarePeg sex toys like Leo Harness with suction cup base and Mel are super-flexible, because they’re so long! Anal depth probes, or I love Mel (“small”) for deep vaginal (posterior fornix / “deep spot”) stimulation.
- Oxballs Super Soft Smoke (Ergo!) silicone is so, so close to SquarePegToys’ SuperSoft density—both makers use 100% US-sourced silicone. Oxballs makes amazing cock rings & ballstretchers, where this flexible silicone indeed feels “blubbery.”
- Bad Dragon’s medium-firmness toys generally test slightly softer than the 00-50 silicones from other makers. It’s close enough that many users won’t notice. (Remember, when getting XL toys, you’ll probably want medium or even soft, because thicker feels harder!)
- 00-50 silicone is the most popular density for fantasy & indie dildos; it’s definitely squishy, and tests around 0.5 on the shore A scale.4 This is Uberrime’s “Soft Shore” as in the Sensi vag plug / small dildo; Pleasure Forge’s & Strange Bedfellas’ “medium” firmness; Xenocat Artifacts, & Lust Arts’ “soft” firmness. This firmness is so popular because it’s so comfortable, and fleshy. Depending on the shape and size of the toy, it can bend a lot.5
- Mr. Hankey’s Toys’ 75% Soft firmness (mmmm) now is more like 00-80 Shore.
- Bad Dragon’s firm firmness is called “8,” but there’s no way it’s 8A: more likely 00-80 shore, so much softer. Still, I sometimes wish I’d gotten Flint’s textured plates in the medium density, because those some intensely filling ridges.
- Tantus’ Super Soft dildo collection is now actually soft, at about 2A shore! Originally at an 8–9A Shore ranking when Super Soft came out in 2017, Tantus has listened to user feedback so that Super Soft silicone is very flexible and squishy (especially in the NOT XL toys: remember that the thicker a dildo is, the firmer it will feel inside).
- John Thomas Toys’ (United Kingdom based fantasy dildos & silicone stretchers) Soft option is 2A Shore as well, not the 15A that the manufacturer reports. See my Diablo’s Finger review for more. I have no idea how firm the medium density is, but wouldn’t be surprised if it’s softer than the 20A the maker reports.
Still Soft, Not SOOOO Squishy
- SquarePegToys’ “Firmer” silicone is not firm by other makers’ standards, at about 5A. I recommend the XS or small Egg Plugs in this density if you want the easiest insertion experience, as the necks fold over less. And for SquarePeg’s Firmer realistics (life-cast dildos!), I think Nathan actual size especially is better in Firmer Ultraviolet / Pink silicone; a more erect firmness.
- Twin Tail Creations and Exotic Erotics use 6A silicone as their medium density.
- NS Novelties’ ColourSoft line (I was in love with the 8″) is much more flexible than the Colours Pleasures line, testing at about 6A shore. This series includes 8″ (2″ diameter) and 5″ (1.5″ max. diameter, small head) options; see the bigger one bent in half below!
- Uberrime Dildos uses a 10NV silicone that comes out at about 7A shore to make the Fire & Ice coloration Night King (my favorite textured toy) and the Xenuphora Tentacle Dildo. I dig this firmness A LOT for the Night King’s winding ridges: I feel the ridges well but they’re not uncomfortable to thrust.
- The pink-to-blue fade Dildolls Utopia is 7–8A Shore. Quite flexi, because it’s not a thick toy. It has a semi-transparent look that’s almost reminiscent of jelly—but safer.
- Fleshjack Boys (and I would bet Fleshlight Guys too, though I haven’t tried the latter) dildos are just the about the closest overall firmness you can get to an erection in single-density silicone: but they won’t have the skin-like squish of softer silicone. The silicone of my Brent Corrigan tests at 8 to 9A, and has a slightly draggy, skin-textured finish.
- Fantasy makers Twin Tail Creations and Exotic Erotics report that their firm firmness is about 8A shore, while this is Damn Average’s medium-firm.
- Hankey’s Toys’ “medium firm” option tests between 8 and 9A on the shore scale, so slightly firmer than Bad Dragon’s firm. If you don’t want your giant dildo to be either hard or too flexible, this is the way to go!
- BMS Factory’s Addiction suction cup dildos are 9 to 10A shore, meaning that “Brandon” and “Luke” are the most realistic-feeling glow-in-the-dark dildos I know. Or check out “Ben” and and “Tom” for a super-affordable fantasy toy, with plates and dots all over.
- Blush’s newest Avant toys (D14–16) are 10A, so pretty flexible and super-silky. OMG the pastel colors too; I had to pose them with flowers. The silicone is just soft enough—due to these toys’ slender sizing—that I’m sneaking them in the softest section of this guide!
- Ditto with the beautifully pastel-drippy Dildolls Fantasia, which is a couple Shore points firmer than its sibling the Dildolls Utopia. Fantasia reminds me of pastel sherbert ice cream! It glows in the dark.
Medium-Soft Dildos
Next are dildos that I would classify as “medium firm,” between 10A and 19A shore. You can bend these middle-of-the-density-road dildos in half if you’re really trying, but they won’t yield much as a soft toy while you’re thrusting fast. See a flexibility demo of these here. From softest-medium to firmest-medium:
- The original Uberrime Night King GOT-inspired dildo is 10A. Night King’s ridges are very stimulating in this density, IMO: if you want gentler, go for the Fire & Ice coloration. My review includes a YouTube vid comparison!
- The firm (or “hard”) option from Damn Average, Pleasure Forge, New Folklore Silicone, Strange Bedfellas, and Kudu Voodoo equals 10A, while this is Lust Arts’, Xenocat Artifacts‘, and Split Peaches’ medium firmness. This means that the silicone is starting to feel soft, especially in toys that aren’t really girthy (like under 2″ diameter).
- The Geode Crystal dildo is a super-textured toy that, thankfully, Number One Labs says is 10A silicone (so those rock-looking bits won’t grate). Watch it being squished in this product listing.
- The Tantus Magma is a 10A shore, so between the company’s other “flexible” offerings and the slightly softer Super Soft toys. I like the added flexibility over the original (Tantus Splash) because I can bend Magma’s shaft and use its drippy texture to massage my clit.
- Fuze Silicone’s Ten series (like the Foreman, Ace, and Nova) is 10A silicone.6 The thinner toys in the series are getting fairly flexible, with a more realistic feel; I find that Foreman, which tests up to 12A, is still a tad hard for maximum lifelike effect.
- Lovehoney’s new Lifelike Lover Luxe Silicone dildos are the softest Lovehoney-own-brand toy: it’s softer than other Lifelike Lover Luxe models. It’s really flexible, it has a slick finish and a superb suction cup, and the head is G-spot-friendly.
- Vixen Creations’ single-density toys (everything that’s not the dual-density VixSkin or a packer) are about 12A, meaning that they’re not too hard at all, but not soft either. Leo is a favorite of many people. I have the Large Realistic Bent, whose big ridge makes an impact at 15A shore!
- The Cloud 9 Pro Sensual realistic dildos are super-cheap, straight toys with a slicker feel than most realistic silicone dildos. They test between 13 and 15 shore—but the thicker one I tested feels fairly firm!
- Mostly discontinued: Doc Johnson’s American POP! Rebel (review here) and Icon—the only body-safe dildos in the American POP! series—are softer I would’ve guessed, at 12A shore. Rebel’s head has a little give, and the rounded coronal ridge is forgiving when thrust fast.
- Blush Novelties’ Avant dildos—which are covered in bright stripes—are colorful toys that I’m a fan of. Their 15-shore silicone (for the original models, all Avant P models and Avant D1-6) feels a lot more forgiving to me than similar-density options (it must be the satin-smooth finish!). The smaller models in particular—that is, the Avant Pride dildos—can really bend, and the D5/D6 wiggle around like crazy when you suction-cup them to a flat surface and then poke them. I love the Avant D5, which is more flexible than the Avant D3 with its bulbous head and textured shaft. The Blush Temptasia Reina is the same silicone.
- Most of Geeky Sex Toys’ nerdy silicone dildo designs are 15A shore. That means my Drodong dragon dildo’s small, tapered head doesn’t bend too much when I’ve tried to insert it anally, and I can feel its slick but scaly texture well.
- Rock Candy Sugga Daddy—basically, unicorn horns with penis heads—are 15A, so slightly flexible, with a satiny finish. They’re low-priced and come in four different sizes.
- Godemiche’s standard silicone is 15A, with points of the shaft testing down to 12A shore. Ambit has a great G-spot/prostate shape. The shaft will be slightly flexible when it’s stuck to a wall/chair/tile/whatever.
- Blush Novelties’ Ruse series (in particular, the super-curved Magic Stick) is a tad softer than many other realistic dildos, at approximately 16A shore. These also have a satin-smooth finish that I think makes them feel gentler.
- Uberrime’s Astra dildos are a 16A shore for more G-spot pressure / being better as a prostate massager.
- BS Silicone/ BS Atelier (formerly BS Is Nice) creates beautiful artisan toys with a dripping-paint effect, out of 15A silicone that tests up to 18A shore. BS Silicone also makes split density toys like Nude: those have a soft (7A) head that transitions into the firmer shaft.
- NS Novelties now has a Colours Wave suction cup dildo (review here) that’s more abstract, silkier, and slightly softer than the company’s realistic Colours Pleasures toys, at about 17A shore.
- Most Funkit Toys dildos (besides the NoFrillDos) are all 18A, so slighty softer than the NoFrillDos; in use, the difference will be minuscule.
- Funkit Toys’ new, inexpensive Nofrilldo toys are glossy silicone poured in 20A shore, but test at about 19A. The thinner models like the G Dildo are bend-able in a harness because of their length-width ratio.
- Split Peaches, maker of Unicorn Horns and the steampunk-inspired Rivetor, previously used fairly-firm-with-just-a-little-squish 20A silicone for almost all their toys. But now medium (10A) and “Super Squish” (00-50) are options in all toy listings.
Other silicone toys that aren’t in this list (because I have no experience with them) are Pleasure Works’ single density (not Firm Core); Wet for Her; any of the various densities of Hole Punch “artisanal” toys; Doc Johnson’s Platinum Edition single-density (not Truskyn); and Fleshlight’s Fleshlight Freaks (though the latter may use the same silicone as the Fleshjack Boys and Fleshjack Guys).
Firm Dildos
The most firm dildos are not silicone: glass and stainless steel are extra-hard. Go with the Njoy Pure Wand for the most intense spot pressure (G-spot or prostate) around, known for inducing squirting.
And as for silicone favorites: see a flexibility demo here, and keep reading for softest-firm to hardest-firm. Remember, the higher the number on the Shore (A) scale, the harder it feels!
- Blush Novelties’ Temptasia dildos (except Reina) are affordable, abstract toys in 20A silicone, with a silky finish.
- Many mass-produced, realistic, suction cup dildos, like NS Novelties’ Colours Pleasures and Firefly Pleasures glow-in-the-dark dildos (see my Firefly 5″ review here), as well as the Colours Yum Yum stripe-marbled toys; Bondara’s Mr Realist series (my review here); and the Lovehoney Lifelike Silicone models, are right at 20A shore. If you’re looking for toy feels as realistic as it looks, consider the squishy ColourSoft series (discussed later) or a dual-density dildo.
- Lovehoney’s 7″ Curved Silicone Dildo (CA version here; UK version here) and Curved 5.5″ (CA; UK) are firmer,7 abstract toys with a satiny silicone finish. The hardness helps keep the 7″ Curved’s dramatic curve stable during suction cup play, though I prefer it as a vibrating dildo.
- Fuze Silicone’s original dildo collection (including the Velvet, Wilde, Alpha, and Harmony) are 20A silicone8 with a slick gloss finish, like most “flexible” Tantus. These Fuze dildos are unique because they have angled bases with lots of ridges, to stimulate the vulva of anyone wearing them in a harness.
- Fuze Silicone also now makes suction cup dildos with a similar firmness: fairly hard. I found that this makes Freddie’s forward curve more intense for G-spot stimulation!
- Fun Factory’s standard silicone is firm and draggy. At 21 to 22 shore, my Boss has a touch more give than Tantus flexible silicone—but still feels very imposing!
- The SI Novelties Major Dick Commando camo dong is truly awful, IMO. But in case you really need to know, it tests at about 23A shore, so pretty hard but not like a rock.
- Sedeux dildos by Sportsheets are abstract dildos that claim to be “soft” and “flexible” but good for harness use. The latter may be true, but these glossy toys are not soft, at 25A shore.
- Maia’s nonphallic dildos are hard but velvety silicone that actually has an empty (but fully sealed and watertight) core.
- Tantus’ original, “flexible” silicone, like in the Tantus Vibrating Vamp: Around 30A shore, up to 35. These toys are made to stay steady in harnesses, and are suited for intense stimulation. My Tantus Vamp Super Soft review compares this original density to Tantus’ new, softer options.
- The Luzarte Jollet & Jollie polka-dotted dildos’ firm, smooth (40A) silicone is made for firm, rounded G-spot pressure. Excellent because they come with a bullet vibe hole for more stimulation. I recommend wiggling and jiggling Jollet in combo with vibration!
- The CalExotics Silicone Grip Thruster is the hardest silicone toy I own at 50A shore—luckily it’s a more petite 1.25″ diameter! Yikes.
Figuring Out What You Want
Not sure exactly what you’d like? The most affordable way to get a general idea of whether you like firm or soft is to check out one or two of the following silicone dildos under $30:
- Hard: Tantus Acute, grab bag version.
- Pretty firm (not rock solid, but definitely not soft): Blush Luxe dildos for more abstract; or Colours Pleasures Small, Colours Pleasures Thin, or Blush Ruse dildos for realistic options.
- Medium firmness: Blush Novelties Avant P1 through P3 (review here) and Temptasia Reina are just bordering on soft. I love the satiny finish on these toys, and the Avant models have good suction cups too.
- Kinda squishy: ColourSoft 5″, a soft but veiny suction cup dildo in 6A shore.
- Super soft: SquarePeg’s Blunt Plugs are a dildo/plug hybrid that’s very squishy, like a fantasy dildo.
- Cheap dual-density! Soft outside, plus firm core for a more erect-like effect. Two of the Neo Elite realistic dildos sell for under $30. That’s awesome for two layers of platinum silicone.
If you’re looking for a fantasy toy that can be custom-ordered in different densities, inexpensive options include: Strange Bedfellas’ size small toys; Damn Average’s smaller toys, which randomly appear in the Etsy shop in various firmnesses; and the small or mini sizes of many Exotic Erotics dildos go for $35–40 (without custom colors added).
Thanks for reading! I hope this guide helps you find a toy that’s just right for you. Feel free to email me at phallophilereviews@gmail.com for specific recommendations.
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Notes
- Assuming you have their consent to this, of course!
- Don’t confuse these with Colours 2X dual density TPE, which is porous and shouldn’t be used long-term.
- Though Kudu Voodoo does offer super-soft dildos in the softer 00-20 silicone, which is what Bad Dragon uses for its penis masturbation sleeves.
- 00-50 silicone and 5A silicone feel a lot different; the 00 and A scales are not equivalent.
- Especially in fantasy-toy “small” or “mini,” like 2″ max. diameter or less. Toys with heavy heads or long, straight shafts will bend in half more easily than tapered toys.
- Plus or minus 2 degrees in shore, again because variation occurs!
- I get 21A for the 7″ Curved.
- Plus or minus 2 degrees of shore durometer, because Fuze is very precise; my Alpha tests at 21A.
Dear,
I am in search of a good silicone dildo for pegging for first timers. I very much liked your this article on firmness. I found VixSkin line esp. Goodfella very attractive. I was told that it will not work as it should be hard for anal or pegging. Are VixSkin products too soft for pegging? Should I go for Tantus products? Kindly give your valuable advice and guide me. Thanks in advance.
I’m not sure who told you that, but tons of people love VixSkin for pegging! Give it a go if you’re interested.
I love your articles ,they are so helpful and erudite and I like anything that comes with explanations. It’s pertinent to know which dildo materials are safe and non-porous (silicone) and how they can be cleaned and your articles cover that information. I’m glad I came across this site.
Thanks so much! I’m glad you enjoy my style! I do like to give as many details as possible (because I love details!) while still being readable. Please let me know if you have any specific questions!
This article was very helpful! However I can’t afford trial and error with such expensive items, unfortunately. I am looking for a toy I can comfortably pack with and also use. One that maybe I can bend to go between my legs and tuck in boxer briefs? I use an underwear harness. If you could help point me in the right direction I would love to hear your suggestions. I don’t know my preference for hardness, usually not too squishy but firm enough for play.
Honestly I think there’s only one option that’s multipurpose enough to work well for both penetrative play and comfortable, not-too-bulgy packing, and that’s New York Toy Collective’s dildos with a bendable metal rod as their core, like Shilo here. Those are expensive is the thing. Anything else that bends easily is going to be necessarily be kinda squishy.
Thank you! I have done loads of research here and I have come to the same conclusion. It definitely seems to be the best fit for what I want. Finally going to order so I will let you know the results!
Thank you for posting all this information. extremely helpful. Just got vixskin 8 in 1.5 inch diameter suction cup . No smell body safe ,it cost 3 x as much as a stinky rubber one. Well worth it… any suggestions we are looking for longer 12 plus 1.75 max body safe of course but something a little softer than the vixskin for oral fun? Had a cyber glow that was real nice don’t know if it was body safe? Very soft and good for oral practice.
Hi there, sorry for the slow response! Yes, Cyberskin isn’t great for prolonged use especially because it’s porous and will allow bacteria to start growing.
Softer than VixSkin is hard to find: you’re going to want to go for an uncored, soft fantasy dildo, and even then, finding one that’s very long without being too thick is a big challenge. Maybe check out the SquarePeg Slink, or browse Mr. Hankey’s toys. With that length, finding a good, working suction cup is going to be extremely difficult.
Lots of information to take in. Thanks again!!! Do you have any recommendations for a soft double end dildo ? Body safe.
Even after we read all of this info. Wow ! Who do you trust ? Found a double ended 16.5 inch Dorcel dildo. on 2 different sites both have different opinions? Bettys toy Box and Early to bed . Neither say body safe. but they say silicone. We don’t want a smell porous one. Now back to the best lube! 🙂
Even after we read all of this info. Wow ! Who do you trust ? Found a double ended 16.5 inch Dorcel dildo. on 2 different sites both have different opinions? Bettys toy Box and Early to bed . Neither say body safe. but they say silicone. We don’t want a smell porous one. Now back to the best lube! 🙂 Thanks
I trust both of those. At any reputable retailer, silicone should be silicone, and all truly silicone sex toys are body-safe. It’s just that sometimes on Amazon or Ebay or Aliexpress or similar, companies will label toys as silicone that are actually TPE. You won’t have that issue at those two shops or at any of my favorite online sex toy sellers.
Sliquid is really great! I use Sliquid Sassy most of the time.
My apologies for missing your previous comment! Unfortunately there really aren’t many double dildos that are actually *soft* silicone. If the flexibility is what you’re looking for, then the Blush Ruse double dil is U-shaped (but not particularly soft).
Would you say mr Hankeys medium firm is firmer then vixsen dual density? I have the outlaw but feel it’s to soft for anal
Hankey’s medium density is definitely harder than the super-soft outer layer of all VixSkin toys. It’s not really firm, but it’s not so, so squishy either. I think “medium” is a perfect name for it.
Which would be your preference for a combination of oral and pegging (anal) use out of Mr Hankeys medium firm, 75% soft, or Vixskin? We are very close to pushing the button on either a Hankeys Rentman or an Outlaw. How to decide?? 🙂
Ooh, that’s a great question! It’s hard because they are different experiences I can’t say that one is better than the other for penetration.
For toys to *blow*, though, I would pick any Hankey’s because I feel like there’s a touch more skin texture, vs. VixSkin feeling extra-super-smooth when wet.
With Outlaw, the firm core does make it stay straighter, so it depends on whether you’re wanting to ram-rod your partner more like a fucking machine—or whether you want to lean over them in doggy and have the soft silicone bend easier with your bodies.
I hope this makes sense? Thanks for reading.
That’s helpful, thank you!
I’m on the receiving end, and to be honest she probably spends more time ram-rodding it into my throat than other places, so maybe Hankeys it is.
Also, based on what I’ve seen you write elsewhere on here, you think the medium firm Hankeys option loses some of that skin realism? Or would it be necessary for vigorous play, because the 75% would be more prone to folding over and being excessively floppy?
Thanks again <3
Girlfriend wants a first dildo and I was just about to pull the trigger on the ColourSoft 8″ when I found the Colours Dual Density 8″. I’m in decision paralysis! Suggestions? I also saw on peepshow that the the dual density is 1.8 in diameter vs the soft which is 2.0 in diameter. Is that true, or should I assume they are the same size? Your articles are super helpful!!
I would be in decision paralysis too!!! I’ve had both for about three months now, and it’s like flipping a coin a lot of the time.
So in re the sizing, the Colours Dual is slightly smaller. It’s really about 1.85″ diameter, while the ColourSoft is 1.9 something. It’s not a huge difference but if you have both side by side and are looking really hard, you might notice.
I do really like the extra squish in the head with the Colours Dual, since its outer layer is about 1A shore vs. the 6A of the ColourSofts. I’d say the Colours Duals feel more realistic overall except for that the fact that the balls have the firm core too, so it’s unusual to me how hard they are.
I don’t know how you stay so on top of your comment threads. It’s amazing. So based on what you’re saying, I’ll probably go with the Dual, unless there is any benefit of getting the Soft for a beginner. THANKS!
One last question – as I still haven’t pulled the trigger on the Colours Dual or Soft. My own diameter is 1.75″, which she has no problem with (no warm up needed, etc). Considering that the Dual is 1.85″ and the Soft is 1.9″, is that a big enough difference from my own girth for a significant difference? The goal of buying the toy was to incorporate something thicker for more fullness / stretch. If you were us, would that factor into whether or not you chose the Dual vs Soft (or something else entirely like the 2″ Jammy Ruse – which I wish was softer)?
I’d probably go with the ColourSoft, knowing that. Also, I like that (although the vein texture is still pretty apparent) the ColourSoft doesn’t absorb quite as much lube/isn’t quite as sticky as the Colours Dual.
Your shore strength guides are so helpful- especially the corresponding youtube videos, it’s a lot easier to get the idea from seeing that from description (for me anyway)
Awesome! I’m glad I added the videos, you’re right, it’s nice to *see* the toys sometimes instead of just reading descriptions.
This one is one of your articles I often come back to. It is so helpful when wondering if a toy would be a good option for me. I also really appreciate that you added the videos. It is helpful to see the squish and the toy bends under your fingers. Happy birthday to your blog!
Thanks for the kind words, and I’m glad the guide has helped!!!
This blog post is SO helpful to me. My partners and I own a bunch of relatively cheap silicone dongs (all shaped like human peens) and then one expensive Bad Dragon fantasy dong. We want to find a realistic pale flesh-coloured dildo that’s around as soft as the Bad Dragon one because the others we own are just so firm it kind of hurts to get pounded with them. I’ve been looking through your list of soft dildos and most of them seem to be weird colours or fantasy shapes, which is a shame. Do you know of any dildos that are realistically shaped and coloured (or at least semi-realistic) and still relatively soft?
Thanks so much!
Yay, glad to hear it’s helpful! The outer layer of VixSkin is comparable to BD’s soft firmness (but with a firm core). For G-spot or prostate, Mustang is the best.
We have the Vixen Vixskin Mustang, but my wife would like a softer squishier dildo (the same si,e or slightly less girthy). What would you recommend?
I recommend a soft and *uncored* toy, so you get that gentleness like in Mustang’s ridge but without the hardness underneath. In particular, check out Mr. Hankey’s Toy’s Xtra-Small series, which are squishy and super-flexible. Big Daddy and Anaconda are about the same max. girth as Mustang, and just slightly longer. Like VixSkin, Hankey’s silicone has a slicker feel.
My wife and I have been looking for a dildo for her to use to simulate addind a 3rd. We tried a suction cup vibrator and it just didn’t do it for her because it had to much flop. She thought it felt too much like someone with a semi, and wanted something that felt more like a very hard erection with little flex to it. It seems like either the Willys or the Ruse are the best option of we go with silicon, but I didnt know of those are even really that rigid. Most reviews seem to love that you can fold a dual core dildo in half with little effort, which, unless I have abnormally firm erections, is not SUPER realistic, so it’s difficult to find any really helpful info. Any thoughts? Is silicon just not going to work? What other materials should we look at?
Silicone is the only non-porous material that be soft, so it’s your only truly hygienic option. (TPR/TPE and PVC allow bacterial buildup.)
The Ruse Jammy & Silicone Willy’s have plastic cores inside, so they’re definitely not bending. However, they don’t feel especially realistic because you lose the skin feel with the silicone layer being approximately 15A shore.
Flexibility also varies according to how thin the dual-density dildo is in proportion to its length. So, for example, the Blush Neo Elite 7.5″ is significantly easier to bend than the 6″ model made of the same silicones because of the proportions.
My thought is that your best compromise is the Uberrime Splendid, as it’s not especially soft outside and it’s a bit flexible but not especially. (I mean, the erections I’ve encountered have been slightly flexible too, not rock solid!) Also keep in mind that it’s fine to apply larger amounts of force to a dildo than you would want to to a human being, because pain.
I have a YouTube vid here I made a while back showing the firmer dual-density silicone dildos!
What would recommend that is thick, realistic, cheap and not too much drag when using?
How would you define “thick”? Give me some dimensions, and I’ll see what I can come up with!
Great blog post! Very informative but now I’m getting paralysis trying to decide. I’ve been looking for a new toy for my partner to peg me with. She enjoys the realistic and dark/black skinned toys the most. Looking for something in 1.5-1.75 diameter range but not too short. She currently uses a longer toy on me that has about 8 inch insert able but only just over 1 inch diameter. The coloursoft 8 inch looks good but just not sure I can go up to 2 inch, but everything I find in the 1.5-1.75 is like 5 inch insert able only.
OK, so long but not above average width. How about these:
I hope this helps!
I’m trying to understand the shore scale in relation to firmness. I have a question about this line:
“Bad Dragon’s firm firmness is called “8,” but there’s no way it’s 8A: more likely 00-80 shore, so much softer.”
Are you saying that Bad Dragon’s firm is softer than 8A?
However, looking at the graphic of Shore Scale Firmness in relation to each other, it seems that 00-80 would be extremely above 8A.
“The graphic still labels 30A as soft too, but that’s soft for industrial use; 40A is “medium soft,” as per Smooth-On. But 40A doesn’t feel too much different from glass when it’s pounding you.”
I understand in your notes that you mentioned:
“4. 00-50 silicone and 5A silicone feel a lot different; the 00 and A scales are not equivalent.”
Perhaps I am misunderstanding, it would be great if you could clarify. =)
Thanks for the all great information!
Hi!! Yes, the Smooth-On graphic doesn’t line up exactly. 00-80 is like .8A, under 1A.
What a wonderful and exhaustive article! Thank you. I have recently started getting into using dildos in my mouth/throat. I have been looking for dildos that are around 1.75 inch thickness but with quite a bit of length for inserting down the throat. They also need to be soft enough (particularly at the tip/head) to bend down the back of the throat but firm enough to be able to thrust with too. It seems impossible to find this sort of slim-ish, long dildo that isn’t a double-ender – and I would rather use something that has a base and a suction cup option. Would you possibly have any recommendations/thoughts?? I am tempted by Mr Hankeys – their XS small range are a great in terms of diameter and the soft/firm options – but they don’t quite have anything slim enough that also has some insertable length.
Hmm! It is going to be hard to find one with a suction cup, especially for really long length. Ideas:
Since you said Hankey’s Toys, I thought of the Hankey’s Anaconda XS, for about 1.75 and about 7 inches length, but maybe you want more.
Do check out [SquarePegToys’s Slim dildos](https://www.peepshowtoys.com/pages/search-results-page?q=squarepegtoys+the+slim?rfsn=7172637.de6d69) that are designed specifically for deep-throating. The [“Firmer Black” one](https://www.peepshowtoys.com/products/squarepegtoys-the-slim-firmer-silicone-deepthroat-dildo-depth-probe?rfsn=7172637.de6d69) is still soft, but not uber-flexible like the other SuperSoft Slims.
Again besides lacking a suction cup, this might work: I recently have been experimenting with the SquarePeg “Thumbdrive” in SuperSoft for throating (it’s a DP plug technically, but once you own a toy you can repurpose it however you want, right?? 😄). I like it because I really can’t take too much over 6 inches length at this point, the thumb curves, and then there’s a bulb that makes it not feel so floppy in the middle despite being SuperSoft silicone. For-reference image I made for a friend (thumb flipped over in second image-half to bend with my throat!).
Suction cup: I’ve used the [Real Supple medium size](https://www.peepshowtoys.com/products/real-supple-silicone-posable-8-25-inch-dildo-by-evolved-novelties?rfsn=7172637.de6d69) for sticking on a wall and trying to take the length of. (Was easier just to hold in my hand, maybe you’re a better contortionist than I am.) These are super-squishy outside, but then have this metal core that bends in any direction you want. The “8.25”-Incher I have is a bit over 6 inches insertable and slim, so the head goes down easier. But [the big one is](https://www.peepshowtoys.com/products/real-supple-silicone-posable-10-5-inch-dildo-by-evolved-novelties?rfsn=7172637.de6d69) apparently 1.75 inches diameter and 8.33 inches insertable length before the balls. The suction cups are strong on flat surfaces.
Hope this helps!! Thank you for the compliment, I definitely have worked hard on this guide!
Do you have a shore rating for the Maia non-phallic dildos you have linked in the “firm” section. Specifically the Kendall (which used to be called the Astra D3, I think)?
Thanks for writing such an informative page!!
Hi! The Maia Kendall/Astra must be about a 40A Shore. Only get it if you’re looking for something quite hard (but with a velvety feel, and *slightly* more flexible & less slick than glass or stainless steel).
Thank you!!! This is so helpful. You’re one of my favorite bloggers ♥️ (I think we have different tastes, but the way you write your reviews means they’re still often very helpful to me. Which is a very good mark of quality in a reviewer! And these master list style posts I haven’t seen anyone else do are super super helpful)