Where to Shop: From Vanilla to Fantasy Sex Toys

So where do you find body-safe sex toys once you learn Amazon is filled with questionable and risky materials? Here’s my breakdown of reputable & discreet online sex toy sellers, including well-known indie & fantasy dildo makers! I focus on shops that sell all-safe materials—like platinum silicone dildos—with notes about how to find good deals.

Sex Shops

Other online retailers that I haven’t personally interacted with, but that have a good reputation, are Smitten Kitten, Come As You Are, SheBop, and Babeland.

Trustworthy Toy Makers & Etsy Shops

I can vouch for these toy makers, most of which are US-based and many US-produced too.



There are many small fantasy dildo makers and Etsy stores out there, but these are the ones that I feel most confident recommending. All shops use skin-safe, platinum silicone for their dildos & other sex toys (like butt plugs, silicone penis strokers, squishies to rub off on clitorally, FtM penetrables, and even “teenies” mini dildos). These are unique, very colorful, and handmade fantasy dildos all!

Shops are US-based unless otherwise noted.

Sexual Health & Wellness Testing

Safe toys are one thing, but sexual wellness of course extends into sex with other human beings too! When you take new partners—even while using condoms or other barrier protection—it can be a real relief to know whether you’ve picked up any STIs. And discretion is a big concern here: For example, once I was concerned about a lingering throat infection after I gave some head at a sex club, so I went to a local clinic for testing—where I was asked questions about who with and what kind(s) of sex I’d had. Even as someone who writes about sex professionally, I found the questions intrusive! Online-ordered STI/STD testing is different: you pick whatever tests you want, you walk in and no one asks you why you need the tests, plus they’re not included in your permanent medical records. Check out:

  • First line of defense: Condoms. I love Lucky Bloke, and I’ve been buying from them for almost five years, to get thinner and/or better-fitting condoms. The sampler packs are very helpful if you don’t know what size is best (or are taking new partners regularly); and the dimensions for each & every condom are present in its listing. In my experience, lots of guys who require a bigger condom don’t even realize that the average-size ones they’re using are NOT supposed to cut off so much sensation, nor should the condom start slipping off during hard thrusting (which a condom will do if it’s too tight around the base of the penis shaft. That’s scary). Lucky Bloke also only carries safe lubricants too: nothing with glycerin or propylene glycol, which can throw off vaginal pH & facilitate micro-tears. Lucky Bloke is a small business based in Washington, and their customer service is excellent! One time I was trying to get better-sized condoms for my ex before a sexy vacation, and they rushed my order out during a February snowstorm.
  • STDCheck.com (Get $15 off by clicking this link) is a well-established, US-based service that uses FDA-approved tests. I pay for the 10-test panel myself, regularly, & would highly recommend it. You order the test(s) you want online, then visit a walk-in lab during business hours, whenever you want, to give your sample. Quest Diagnostics (they’re like the Walgreens of lab testing, tons of locations) and other major lab-test services are included, so there are tons of location options. Then, you get individual test-by-test result notifications as they come in, starting as early as 12 hours after you give your blood/urine samples, and with 2 days max. result time. It’s fast, which takes a lot of stress out if you’re anxious (like me!). The service’s doctors can prescribe and/or refer if you are positive for an STI with treatment.5 Or get more variety with their sister site, HealthLabs.com (15% off link here), which offers STI testing plus sex-hormone testing, general wellness tests, etc. in the same order—you choose what you need.

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  1. Even porous TPR/TPE penis toys, which are in the “lesser evil” category: they’re nontoxic, but require more care because they can begin to let bacteria & mold grow if they’re not cleaned thoroughly right after use or they’re left in direct sunlight, too much heat & humidity, etc.
  2. “Soft plastic” equals TPR/TPE, for the record; Lovehoney has made this toy material confusing lately.
  3. Desktop vs. mobile, respectively. On mobile, use the “Add or Remove Filters” drop-down menu right under the top cartoon and category name.
  4. Pick “Phthalate-free – Non-porous” to opt for only body-safe toy in any category (especially ones like “Realistic vibrators”) where some more-porous materials (TPR/TPE and PVC) are included.
  5. For example, bacterial infections like chlamydia, gonorrhea, and syphilis can be cured by simple antibiotics. Or, I had a platonic friend who used STDCheck.com and tested positive for herpes (which is not curable), so she received information and counseling from a medical professional about how to avoid future outbreaks and how to best manage the condition.

10 thoughts on “Where to Shop: From Vanilla to Fantasy Sex Toys”

  1. This is really helpful! I really had no idea about where to go for trusted quality products. I really love how you separated out the different categories too.

  2. Thank you for posting such a comprehensive list! I know so many people who don’t know where to shop for the products they want (besides Amazon), and now I can just send them this link 🙂

    • I’m glad to help! And thanks so much for sharing! I love supporting smaller retailers—especially ones who sell for fair prices and who take pride in selecting quality toys.

  3. Hodgepodge Entourage would have never been googled had it not been for this article!! I purchased 5 teenie squishes to get an idea of softness/firmness that would be more to my tastes. I really wanted miniatures of both of the sleeves as they would be amazing for Vulva attention. She normally doesn’t do that so, yea! She’s got a super fan now 🤩

  4. Okay, first off this site is AMAZING. I haven’t been sucked into a website like this since Wikipedia, lol. (I’ve got so many tabs open!) I’ve technically been buying toys for years, but I do it so rarely I still don’t really know what I want. I have a feeling that’ll change once I go through this site. So thanks for that!

    Now here’s my problem: I very much need to stick to cash for my purchases. I know it’s sad in this day and age, but it’s for personal reasons. So far the only toy site I’ve found that’s compatible with this IS Amazon. Do you know of any others? And if not, what makes these sites so discreet?

    Thanks in advance!

    • Hi, thank you so much for the compliment!!!

      With Amazon the concern is the supply chain: whether the makers and all vendors can be trusted to tell the truth about materials. Amazon selling is honestly a cut-throat world, where the lowest price wins; so that doesn’t leave much room for quality control.

      Have you considered a prepaid credit card? You could buy a Visa or Mastercard gift card with cash, and then use that at a reputable retailer.


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