As a professional dildo & vibrator reviewer, I own almost $40,000 worth of sex toys! So which are my *favorite* sex toys: the ones I use for fun masturbation, vs. obligatory work masturbation? All my sex toy reviews focus on the feeling I get from each product: the little details that make an experience either sensual…or disappointing.
These are the ones, the body-safe sex toys that work best with my anatomy. My enthusiasm for them knows no bounds!!! (So you can bet I’ll be using a lot of exclamation points in this post! 😊)
Every human being has slightly different preferences. *Never* believe posts titled “The Best Sex Toys Every Woman Should Own!”—that’s pure click-bait. (Nothing works for *every* person with a clit & vagina; we’re not monochrome.) Here in my favorite sex toy post, I explain exactly why I think each toy is awesome, giving a quick dildo review or vibrator review for each sex toy. In contrast, my list of the best sex toys by category is based on diverse opinions, and describes how different toy types stimulate differently.
My Favorite Sex Toys
As a phallophile, silicone dildos are my bread & butter, my favorite sex toys overall. I focus on silicone because it’s the only body-safe material that can feel soft, more like skin. Dual-density dildos are especially realistic, so many of my faves (especially for vaginal play) are two layers of silicone! Also see my anal dildo faves here. Hooray for all this dildo testing!
Best affordable skin feel: BMS Naked Addiction Dual Density Dildo (shop here): I knew the BMS Naked Addiction Dual Density was a winner the first time I touched it. The balance of soft outside (like skin!) and firm core is quite lifelike (see review for an in-motion video), and—marvelously!—the finish isn’t uber-sticky like so many other duals. The Naked Addiction Dual’s head is tapered, so it’s easy to insert if you aren’t a large-head enthusiast. At $60, its quality is as good (or better!) than many dual dildos twice its price. Only downside? The G-spot pressure isn’t great. Full review here.
Best cheaper pick: Blush Neo Elite 7.5 Inch Dildo (shop Neo Elite here): The Neo Elite 7.5 Inch is IMO the most realistic of this affordable two-layer Neo Elite lineup—and it tapers from a small head to an average-girth shaft. (Which is why I like it for easier anal, see below!) Comparison of all 8 Neo Elite shapes here. I also really like it for deeper vaginal penetration along with a clit vibe!
Best wearable dildo: SquarePegToys G squeeze (shop here): This toy is an adventure, because it’s not a “normal” dildo: it’s a wearable one. Squishy, comfortable G-spot stimulation, but also deeper stimulation (posterior fornix) and just a full feeling at the vaginal opening (where so many nerve endings are located). I would definitely recommend this toy (1) to feel full during clitoral stimulation (like while using my We-Vibe Melt), and (2) for humping, essentially; I like the movement most while bike-riding. G squeeze comes in 4 different sizes! Read what I do with each size in the full review.
Best 100% SOFT realistic dildo: SquarePegToys Leo or Dirk (shop here): SquarePegToys’ Leo version 2 is the best long dildo I’ve ever owned, by far. Fabulous for “deep spot” stimulation (posterior fornix or deep anal), and the Harness version in small–1X sizes includes a FlushCup suction cup. Back up into that door or shower wall, Leo’s so “meaty” that it’s hard to tell apart from a real dick (during rear entry). OR, if you love shorter, thick toys, then you may share my huge enthusiam for Dirk 1X. It’s so fat & filling in the best way. SquarePegToys was the first maker of 100% soft body-safe dildos. Huge respect for this company. Full Wyatt dildo review here compares all SquarePeg’s SuperSoft silicone realistics.
My best G-spot dildo: Pleasure Tailor Triarx has the best G-spot curve & ridge, a balanced realistic firmness in triple-density platinum silicone. And the vein texture is designed to be really stimulating to rub against (clitorally). It’s more G-spot pressure, really targeting the spot. The built-in suction cup is strong as well, and overall the Triarx is so lightweight and easy to jerk compared to the $500 RealCock2 dildos. (Triarx also fits better in a standard harness.) The Triarx’s appearance isn’t as realistic as a RealCock2, for sure; and the skin texture is more stylized. But I’m still coming very hard on the Triarx dildo, while my wrists are thanking me!
Vibrators & Pulsators
Best G-spot & rumbly clit vibe!: BMS Pillow Talk Sassy (shop here): I’m basically an evangelist for the Pillow Talk Sassy, which is 100% my favorite G-spot vibrator. (See my full ranking of kick-ass G-spot vibes here.) The perfectly curved head, the slightly flexible shaft, the silky silicone…and oh yeah, the rumbly vibrating power. And fully adjustable strength!!! Plus it’s pretty quiet. Now in teal or lilac. Full Sassy review here.
Best clit suction: We-Vibe Melt (shop here): The best air pulse “suction” toy for my body—I like it more than even the best Womanizer, and a helluva lot more than any Satisfyer (especially pre-Curvy 3+). That’s because Melt’s flexible silicone mouth fits best around my clitoris, and even feels a bit suck-y on the middle settings. Full Melt review here. I LOVE pairing this toy with a good dildo, it’s so much easier to fit than other air pulsation clit toys. Now in navy blue or coral pink.
Best dual-stimulation (clit + vag vibes): We-Vibe’s Nova 2 is absolutely the best “rabbit” vibrator I recommend to everyone. Rabbits can be such a problem to get a good fit with, since clit-to-vagina distance varies by person. But Nova is a whole different ballgame. Its clit stimulator bends and flexes as I thrust Nova 2’s shaft, always rubbing my clit perfectly with rumbly vibration. Better than any self thrusting rabbit vibe, as I’m in control of the speed. Even better: new Nova is softer silicone than any We-Vibe product, ever. This is a beautiful vibrator; toys like Tracys Dog can’t even compete with the quality. Full Nova 2 review here.
Favorite BIG power, small-size vibe: PalmPower Recharge: My favorite power-vibe because it’s so much easier to hold than the Magic Wand, and has more intensity levels!!! (100% adjustable control for the Sultry, vs. 4 steady functions for Magic Wand Rechargeable.) When I got my 1st Magic Wand, I immediately became a wand vibrator convert. Then, I segued into cordless Magic Wand Rechargeable play. (My most toy-savvy ex proclaimed the corded wands “restricting,” and I agree with him about cords during partner play.) Over the years, I’ve found big magic wands tougher and tougher to justify using: So I’ve moved almost entirely to the PalmPower Recharge’s revvvvv-it-up! power, in a tiny body I can fit into sex very easily. Palmpower wand is not as strong as a Magic Wand, but WOW it is strong enough for me: super-fast orgasms on its top strength, and I love the lower vibration range, which Magic Wands don’t have. A Full PalmPower review here.
Best affordable clit vibe w/ more features: Unihorn vibe in yellow: I am over the moon about how the Unihorn Bean Blossom has a moving tongue inside an air-pulsing mouth, so it’s both more direct and less overstimulating for me than a Satisfyer, ironically. Also has two kinds of vibration: rumbly vibes in the air-pulse side, and a buzzier butt motor (optional; they’re independently controlled). Plus it’s $39.99: the only vibrator I ever remember thinking “This should definitely cost more than it does” about. Full Unihorn review here.
Best mini-vibrator: The Swan Maximum Bullet is now my favorite small vibe , because fully adjustable vibration control and the stretchy finger-sleeve melds it to my first 2 fingers—it’s a no-brainer to hold it, left-handed, easily against my clit so my dominant hand can focus on the important work of thrusting the Pillow Talk Sassy or a dildo into myself. (If you’re looking for the strongest mini-vibe, that’s Limited Addiction by Blush, still a powerhouse among “bullet” vibes; but the Max. Bullet is close in power, it’s rumblier, the buttons are easier to work, and again the finger-sleeve, hoooray!!!) Full review here.
Best long-distance / app control vibes: It’s a competitive field—guide here! My favorites:
- For discreet wear, too: I prefer Ohmibod Esca because it’s rumblier than Lovense Lush, and doesn’t have a hard-&-pointy tip. Full comparison chart here. Music absolutely gives Esca purpose: it’s the most fun to wear to a venue where either recorded music is playing (a nightspot on the weekend is what we do) or for live music gigs. Very silent for outside-the-home wear; makes a relaxed evening much more lively 🙌
- Satisfyer Curvy vibrators: Curvy 3+ is my overall favorite Satisfyer air pulse “clit suction” vibrator — it’s like a budget We-Vibe Melt for me. My boyfriend and I found the Satisfyer Connect app is better than We-Vibe’s; no dropped connections. More on the Satisfyer Connect app here.
I’m alotta vagina, but sometimes I like it in my ass too… My favorite sex toys for anal are quite beginner-friendly, but many come in bigger sizes too: especially the Hankey’s Dildos!
SquarePegToys Egg Plug (shop here): Egg Plugs are über-squishy silicone: delightful to clench around. These soft, comfy toys are available in 6 sizes, so naturally I got the XS—but I might work my way up to the small soon! Egg Plugs are a little difficult to insert because of the softness—be warmed up first!—but once they’re in, they fit like a dream. Full review here.
Njoy Pure Plugs (shop here): Stainless steel butt plug perfection. The Pure Plug’s curved shape fits so well, and I was shocked at how comfortable the loop base is. I had no idea I’d enjoy having the Pure Plug’s weight in my butt, but then I started wearing mine out and about…and it both felt good in my ass and satisfied the exhibitionist in me. If you want a good steel plug, the Pure Plugs (available in 3 sizes, plus the larger Pure Plug 2.0) are the one true way. Full review here.
Oxballs Ergo squishy-soft plug (shop here): I’m having a really difficult time choosing between this one and the Egg Plugs, as they’re similar in many ways. I would go with this option if I had a prostate, because of the slightly curvy tip. The base is also a bit larger, to touch more nerve endings outside my hole.
b-Vibe Snug Plugs (shop here): The torpedo-shaped Snug Plugs hold weight inside! The weights kinda jiggle a little, and I like how phallic the oblong body is. Wearing these while exercising (would recommend mowing the lawn with them in!) is fun. The body is hard, but I think the thin neck is very comfortable for wearing for a few hours because lets my sphincters close up around the plug—I don’t feel so stretched. They’re gentle that way. Full review here.
My favorite anal dildos, quick list (smallest to largest):
- Blush Avant P3 or Avant D15 because the silicone is silky but not so soft, so the tapered tip is easy to insert when I’m getting warmed up for more realistic (and bigger) things. Also has a great suction cup.
- Blush Neo Elite 7.5 Inch: Dual-density with a longer length for its girth, so it’s easier to ride. This toy has a very slick feel, which is nice. The suction cup is pretty good.
- Wyatt SuperSoft by SquarePegToys:
Anal thrusting machine: You need a good sex machine if you love anal dildos. A real f*ck machine, with a sturdy body (to hold the toy’s weight and not recoil during penetration) and decent stroke length. Hismith Premium machines are not cheap, but they are cheaper than competitor sex machines.
My Favorite Sex Aids
No favorite sex toys list would be complete without an ode to lube. Plus a dildo mount! I do review a lot of sex toys for women, so if you’re looking for a penis ring / vibrating cock ring, or prostate massager, then see those detailed favorites lists by my colleague All Male Sex Toys.
Lubes & More
LUBE—It’s so important. Necessary for anal play, it also makes vaginal sex, jerking off, and clitoral play (especially with toys) so much more comfortable. These are the safest lubricant options, because almost all water-based lubes contain preservatives and thickeners so they aren’t iso-tonic (balanced for vaginal and anal use). Detailed guide with pH & osmolality ratings here.
- Find Sliquid H2O (safest water-based lube in most toy shops) here: for vag & clit toys!
- Find Sliquid Silk hybrid here: Cuts down on drag with high-texture silicone toys, still easy to clean off! Great as a “cum lube” too. Hybrid lubes are nondamaging to silicone toys.
- Find Oxlube (silicone lube) here: Great with real dick and/or condoms. Only 3 ingredients, no preservatives, a small amount goes a long way. (Would use this lube for everything if silicone lube wasn’t problematic with silicone sex toys; Oxlube is soooo slick.)
- Oil-based lubes make for easier anal & slicker jerking-off: Go with Coconu oil-based for something solid; or buy virgin coconut oil if you don’t mind using a clean spoon to scoop its drippy liquid (at room temp.) onto your toys—coco. oil does require more cleanup, wash thoroughly afterward!
For safety, water-based lubes should not have any of the following in their first one to three ingredients: glycerin, propylene glycol, and/or propanediol. Those ingredients in higher concentrations create hyperosmolality, causing your tissues to push out more water than is natural, breaking down protective cell wall barriers (which should fight against pathogenic bacteria, viruses, and fungus)—both vaginally and anally. Also avoid any ingredient with “paraben” in its name, and steer clear of nonoxynol-9 for sure. Water-based lubricants must include preservatives and thickeners, so choosing safer options is important: Plus, water-based lubricants also can’t harm silicone toys like silicone lube may do in some cases.)
For clit & vaginal play: pH balance is so important for vaginal health, as it wards off bacterial infections (BV) and more. Avoid any lubricant that doesn’t give a specific pH measurement: healthy range (when not menstruating) is between 3.8 and 4.5 pH.
I also recommend for sex with a penis-having partner, or any kinda sex without silicone toys: The silicone lube Oxlube (only 3 silicone-based ingredients, no preservatives needed, 5-year shelf life, made in the USA). Silicone lubes are neutral, and don’t have the osmolality-related safety issues that water-based and hybrids do if they contain those problem ingredients like glycerin, parabens, etc. Though I wouldn’t recommend silicone lube universally with silicone toys; some manufacturers of 100% platinum silicone dildos — i.e., SquarePegToys and Mr. Hankey’s Toys — do endorse silicone lubricant with their toys. In my experience, the silicone lube takes more work to scrub off SquarePeg’s soft silicone (which is annoying), but doesn’t damage the surface.
Liberator Wing Sex Toy Mount (shop here): With so many dildos, I sometimes get bored of jerking it by hand, so the Liberator Wing is a happy change of pace. This sex toy mount (compared here) is the most comfortable way to simulate cowgirl-style riding because of its soft cover and dense foam. I’ve had mine for a year and a half, and it hasn’t compressed one bit! I recommend the Wing with the BMS Naked Addiction Dual together for realistic.
(On a side note, I also feel like I need the newer Liberator Pulse, because the rocking motion sounds fun as hell!)
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