As a professional dildo & vibrator reviewer, I own almost $40,000 worth of sex toys! So which are my *favorite* sex toys: the ones I use for fun masturbation, vs. obligatory work masturbation? All my sex toy reviews focus on the feeling I get from each product: the little details that make an experience either sensual…or disappointing.
These are the ones, the body-safe sex toys that work best with my anatomy. My enthusiasm for them knows no bounds!!! (So you can bet I’ll be using a lot of exclamation points in this post! 😊)
Every human being has slightly different preferences. *Never* believe posts titled “The Best Sex Toys Every Woman Should Own!”—that’s pure click-bait. (Nothing works for *every* person with a clit & vagina; we’re not monochrome.) Here in my favorite sex toy post, I explain exactly why I think each toy is awesome. In contrast, my list of the best sex toys by category is based on diverse opinions, and describes how different toy types stimulate differently.
My Favorite Sex Toys
As a phallophile, silicone dildos are my bread & butter, my favorite sex toys overall. I focus on silicone because it’s the only body-safe material that can feel soft, more like skin. Dual-density dildos are especially realistic, so many of my faves (especially for vaginal play) are two layers of silicone! Also see my anal dildo faves here.
Best affordable skin feel: BMS Naked Addiction Dual Density Dildo (shop here): I knew the BMS Naked Addiction Dual Density was a winner the first time I touched it. The balance of soft outside (like skin!) and firm core is quite lifelike (see review for an in-motion video), and—marvelously!—the finish isn’t uber-sticky like so many other duals. The Naked Addiction Dual’s head is tapered, so it’s easy to insert if you aren’t a large-head enthusiast. At $60, its quality is as good (or better!) than many duals twice its price. Only downside? The G-spot pressure isn’t great. Full review here.
Best cheaper picks:
- Blush Neo Elite 7.5 Inch (shop Neo Elite here): The Neo Elite 7.5 Inch is IMO the most realistic of this affordable two-layer lineup—and it tapers from a small head to an average-girth shaft. (Which is why I like it for easier anal, see below!) Comparison of all 4 Neo Elite shapes here.
- Luminous dual-density glow dildo (shop here): A new favorite. I’m really impressed by how lifelike this toy feels for $32. It’s like VixSkin except slightly less draggy and not handmade. See it compared to other dual-density choices here.
BIG dual-density: Luminous Stud by Evolved: 100% my favorite hands-free, wall-mounted dildo. The chunky head is delicious rubbing between my G-spot and A-spot, so squishy-soft but imposing at the same time. I love the large-headed dildos, what can I say! Do check out the Luminous mid-sized, above, if your tastes aren’t as voluminous as mine.
Best soft G-spotter: Uberrime Splendid Vita (shop here): I love this art dildo! It’s perfect for squishy, comfortable G-spot/P-spot stimulation. So good for G-spot massage if you’re of the more sensitive variety. I can rub Splendid Vita’s prominent head against my spot, gently; or thrust as hard as I want, with no discomfort. I had Uberrime create this one-layer silicone dildo so it’ll bend and rub the front of my vag/under my clit better than the dual-density Splendid. The original dual Splendid is worth considering if you want a more insistent toy! Splendid Vita vs. original Splendid review here.
Best 100% SOFT realistic dildo: SquarePegToys Nathan (shop here): I like Nathan so much, I think I’ve bonded with it. In both sizes! Choose the “Actual Size” for the best soft skin textures—what I strongly recommend to most people. Or, if you like it more intense, go with the Nathan 1X, about 2 inches thick with a great head. I keep finding myself calling the 1X “Daddy” mid-masturbation session! Both Nathans include a FlushCup suction cup and are made by SquarePegToys, the first maker of soft body-safe dildos. Huge respect for this company. Full Nathan review here compares all SquarePeg’s soft realistics.
Best Realistic Dildo: RealCock2 Dirk (shop here): OMG it’s the king of realistic dildos! I’ve wanted one of these bad boys for YEARS, since I first discovered they existed and got drawn in by the moving skin product demo. Spoiler: the skin on the shaft doesn’t move easily, but damn right, the balls sure do! Scrotum demo here. This dildo feels more like human skin than any other silicone product I’ve ever encountered. If you also are a true phallophile, and you can really *feel* different textures internally (i.e., you don’t think all dildos are pretty similar), then the $499+ price tag for any of the five RealCock2 models will be worth it.
Vibrators & Pulsators
Best clit suction: We-Vibe Melt (shop here): The best air pulsation toy for my body—I like it more than even the best Womanizer, and a helluva lot more than any Satisfyer (especially pre-Curvy 3+). That’s because Melt’s flexible silicone mouth fits best around my clit and even feels a bit suck-y on the middle settings. Full Melt review here. I LOVE pairing this toy with a good dildo, it’s so much easier to fit than other air pulsation clit toys.
Best G-spot & rumbly clit vibe!: BMS Pillow Talk Sassy (shop here): I’m basically an evangelist for the Pillow Talk Sassy, which is 100% my favorite G-spot vibrator. (See my full ranking of kick-ass G-spot vibes here.) The perfectly curved head, the slightly flexible shaft, the silky silicone…and oh yeah, the rumbly vibrating power. Plus it’s pretty quiet. Full Sassy review here.
Best dual-stimulation (clit + vag vibes): We-Vibe’s Nova 2 is the only “rabbit” vibrator I will universally recommend. Rabbits can be such a problem to get a good fit with, since clit-to-vagina distance varies by person. But Nova is a whole different ballgame. Its clit stimulator bends and flexes as I thrust Nova 2’s shaft, always rubbing my clit perfectly with rumbly vibration. Even better: new Nova is softer silicone than any We-Vibe product, ever. This is a beautiful vibrator. Full Nova 2 review here.
Best big power vibe: Magic Wand Plus & Rechargeable (shop here): I got the new Magic Wand Plus and immediately became a wand vibe convert. Basically, the Magic Wand Plus is the (Hitachi) Magic Wand Original but with a body-safe, non-staining silicone head and two extra speeds (which I absolutely need!). The deep vibes travel everywhere throughout my pelvic floor, and it’s so good. Speed #3 makes me orgasm in under 30 seconds, then I have to back down to level 2! Then…rinse and repeat. The MW Plus’ only downside is its cord: check out the Magic Wand Rechargeable instead for untethered play. I spent a week of my life writing a guide to wand vibrators, these new Magic Wands are so bold. Full Magic Wand Plus review here.
Best cheaper / beginner option: BMS Essential Bullet (shop here): Want an easy-to-use (or beginner’s) bullet that doesn’t suck? IMO, BMS Factory’s Essential Bullet is the one. It’s pretty rumbly, especially on the first couple speeds; it’s waterproof and rechargeable; it’s silky smooth; and it’s $21. I can even stick it in a huge soft silicone dildo and feel the vibes strongly! Full review here.
It just makes me smile: Sweet Treat spinning ice cream by Satisfyer (shop here): Huge bias here, I love ice cream. But the soft silicone is what makes Sweet Treat orgasmic, not just cute! I love having squishy, textured silicone rub around my vulva (one reason I enjoy fantasy dildos). And the Sweet Treat’s tips are soft and swirling, so I can move its cone up and down my labia, and around the clit, while it grinds against me! Have I mentioned it’s only $30?! More on Sweet Treat Spinnator here.
Favorite shower vibrator: We-Vibe Wand (shop here): This vibe is feature-packed: it’s got a toggle switch for custom speed changes, the motor is robust, it comes with a penis-stroking attachment (and a flappy clit one I haven’t figured out), and it’s long-distance/app-controllable. The adjustable speeds and the ability to use its huge rumbly head in the shower are my favorite part. Now that’s relaxing. Full We-Vibe Wand review here.
Best long-distance options: It’s a competitive field—guide here! My favorites:
- Lovense Lush 2 (shop Lovense): This pink-tail vibe is very strong for a wearable vibrator. I think it’s super-fun to wear around inside tight-fitting shorts, in a semi-public area. Lovense has the best app & strongest Bluetooth connectivity of any vibe-maker currently. Lush isn’t a solo-fun toy for me; I’d rather have a thrustable G-spot vibrator to direct the pressure better. But if you’re looking for a slightly kinky night out, check Lush out! Full review & app details here.
- Satisfyer Curvy vibrators, especially Curvy 3+: So Curvy 3+ is like a budget We-Vibe Melt for me. It’s under $40!!! I would buy Curvy 3+ first if I wasn’t sure about liking air pulsation (“clit suction”) stimulation. It’s pretty strong, and has the option of adding vibration too. My friend with benefits and I think the Satisfyer Connect app is even better than We-Vibe’s—as long as you’re comfortable with video calls. Full Curvy review / comparison here.
OK, so I’ve needed a sex machine for years. Lazy, easy, just lying back and getting screwed. I’ve had handheld thrusting dildos before: those are awesome because they’re easy to position. The Velvet Mini + Holster Bundle is, for example, hands-down the most realistic handheld thrusting dildo around. But the truth is, they all stall when you put a ton of force against them. If you angle them too hard into, say, your pelvic bone (right below the G-spot) or into the back of the rectum, they’ll stall and you’ll need to restart them. It’s a balance, they have limits.
For looooong-lasting sex, the kind a human partner needs to be a beast to keep up, you gotta get a fuck machine. It’s mind-blowing—like, life-changing—if you do love getting screwed. I investigated a few popular options, and got a Doc Johnson Power Banger (pic above). Doc’s machine is sweet because:
- Sturdy body is low to the ground (with has attachable feet) for more stability while you’re getting pounded. (Easy to use on a bed.)
- Twist-dial speed control, lots of range.
- Adjustable angle: so missionary, doggy, froggy, and lying-on-ur-side positions are all possible.
- Vac-U-Lock attachment included so your dildo stays in place.
- It’s surprisingly light & hides in my closet easily.
- Almost 200 strokes per minute, with a realistic thrust length.
The machine does not include a dildo. I highly recommend it with two SquarePeg fleshy-realistic dildos (sold separately), because their “SquarePegHole” takes this machine’s Vac-style plug perfectly.1 Nathan SuperSoft is my boy, 2-inches thick with lots o’ texture & a lovely head ridge; and Leo SuperSoft is extra-flexible, super skin-lined, and great for all y’all who like it deeeeep. Of course the machine in general, and both toys, are good for anal or for vaginal use, or even for getting dick-slapped externally. (Pretty fun on high speed!)
Oh lord, what a relief this machine is in stressful times. Sex machines + 100% silicone attachments are not cheap, but totally worth it for the realism factor. After all, 2020 has taught me: You gotta live now, because you truly never know what’ll happen next.
I’m alotta vagina, but sometimes I like it in my ass too… My favorite sex toys for anal are quite beginner-friendly, but many come in bigger sizes too: especially the Hankey’s Dildos!
SquarePegToys Egg Plug (shop here): Egg Plugs are über-squishy silicone: delightful to clench around. These soft, comfy toys are available in 6 sizes, so naturally I got the XS—but I might work my way up to the small soon! Egg Plugs are a little difficult to insert because of the softness—be warmed up first!—but once they’re in, they fit like a dream. Full review here.
Njoy Pure Plugs (shop here):Stainless steel butt plug perfection. The Pure Plug’s curved shape fits so well, and I was shocked at how comfortable the loop base is. I had no idea I’d enjoy having the Pure Plug’s weight in my butt, but then I started wearing mine out and about…and it both felt good in my ass and satisfied the exhibitionist in me. If you want a good steel plug, the Pure Plugs (available in 3 sizes, plus the larger Pure Plug 2.0) are the one true way. Full review here.
Oxballs Ergo squishy-soft plug (shop here): I’m having a really difficult time choosing between this one and the Egg Plugs, as they’re similar in many ways. I would go with this option if I had a prostate, because of the slightly curvy tip. The base is also a bit larger, to touch more nerve endings outside my hole.
b-Vibe Snug Plugs (shop here): The torpedo-shaped Snug Plugs hold weight inside! The weights kinda jiggle a little, and I like how phallic the oblong body is. Wearing these while exercising (would recommend mowing the lawn with them in!) is fun. The body is hard, but I think the thin neck is very comfortable for wearing for a few hours because lets my sphincters close up around the plug—I don’t feel so stretched. They’re gentle that way. Full review here.
My favorite anal dildos, quick list (smallest to largest):
- Blush Avant P3 or Avant D15 because the silicone is silky but not so soft, so the tapered tip is easy to insert when I’m getting warmed up for more realistic (and bigger) things. Also has a great suction cup.
- Blush Neo Elite 7.5 Inch: Dual-density with a longer length for its girth, so it’s easier to ride. This toy has a very slick feel, which is nice. The suction cup is pretty good.
- Mr. Hankey’s Toys Anaconda (Xtra-Small version): My most comfortable fast-thrusting anal dildo yet! The ridge provides just a little texture, and the shaft is super-flexible so it bends with my rectum. All Hankey’s 75% Soft toys are worth checking out for anal thrusting.
Maia Max (and Monroe): Sometimes you just want a sleek anal thruster, without the prep required for getting ready for larger “butt balls.”That’s what the Maia Max (black) and Monroe (purple) are, plus of course they’re good as textureless vaginal toys too. With a remote control, an adjustable suction cup, vibrating functions, and a not-too-shabby motor, Maia Max is the best anal-friendly self-propelled toy I’m aware of, and the price is pretty damn low too. The only issue? It’s loud, unfortunately. Full review here.
My Favorite Sex Aids
No favorite sex toys list would be complete without an ode to lube. Plus a dildo mount!
Lubes & More
LUBE—It’s so important. Necessary for anal play, it also makes vaginal sex, jerking off, and clitoral play (especially with toys) so much more comfortable.
For safety, water-based lubes need to be free free of glycerin, propylene glycol, parabens, and other junk that can potentially irritate yourjunk. (Water-baseds also can’t harm silicone toys like silicone lube may in some cases.)
The Simply lubes by Wicked are a safe choice that’s my go-to these days. Aqua Jelle is a lil thicker than plain Simpy Aqua, which I like because it doesn’t drip off my toys immediately. Then, I use Wicked’s Simply Hybrid Jelle for everything anal because it’s soooo much thicker and more padded for butt stretching and thrusting.
I also recommend: The silicone Uberlube for PIV sex and with condoms (thumbs up)—though I wouldn’t recommend it across the board with silicone toys; some manufacturers of 100% platinum silicone dildos — i.e., SquarePegToys and Mr. Hankey’s Toys — do endorse silicone lubricant with their toys. In my experience, the silicone lube simply takes more work to scrub off soft silicone, but doesn’t damage the surface.
- Find Simply Aqua Jelle (thick water-based) here: my fave for vag & toys
- Find Wicked Simply Hybrid Jelle (the thickest safe lube) here: my fave for anal toys
- Find Uberlube (silicone lube) here: great with real dick and/or condoms
Liberator Wing Sex Toy Mount (shop here): With so many dildos, I sometimes get bored of jerking it by hand, so the Liberator Wing is a happy change of pace. This sex toy mount (compared here) is the most comfortable way to simulate cowgirl-style riding because of its soft cover and dense foam. I’ve had mine for a year and a half, and it hasn’t compressed one bit! I recommend the Wing with the BMS Naked Addiction Dual together for realistic.
(On a side note, I also feel like I need the newer Liberator Pulse, because the rocking motion sounds fun as hell!)
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