Where to Shop: From Vanilla to Fantasy Sex Toys

So where do you find body-safe sex toys once you learn Amazon is filled with questionable and risky materials? Here’s my breakdown of reputable & discreet online sex toy sellers, including well-known indie & fantasy dildo makers! I focus on shops that sell all-safe materials—like platinum silicone dildos—with notes about how to find good deals.

Sex Shops

Other online retailers that I haven’t personally interacted with, but that have a good reputation, are Smitten Kitten, Come As You Are, SheBop, and Babeland.

Trustworthy Toy Makers & Etsy Shops

I can vouch for these toy makers, most of which are US-based and many US-produced too. All vibrator makers mass-produce their products in China.


  • SquarePegToys is the first maker of 100% Super-Soft silicone & is a fantastic choice for anal toys, or for vaginal toys if you enjoy comfortable fleshy-soft silicone. I very much enjoy their realistic dildos, and the Egg Plugs are absolutely the most-loved butt plug out there for folks who appreciate anal fullness and stretching (with comfort).
  • Tantus has been making body-safe silicone dildos for 20 years now! Their offerings range from the very simple (like the classic Silk) to dual-density toys like Flurry and Cush. I especially recommend the Super Soft silicone dildos, and the pretty-soft, drippy Magma for the adventurous dildo-buyer.
  • We-Vibe creates very rumbly vibe options, plus the fantastic We-Vibe Melt air pulsation clit stimulator. The penis toys & anal toys are “it’s OK, I guess.” A real luxury vibrator brand, that I’ve found to be worth it for Nova 2 and Melt.
  • Mr. Hankey’s Toys makes realistic super-soft silicone that folks love the feel of: I’ve drooled over vibrating Topher Michels, for one, and I also enjoy my Nick Capra (in gold metallic tones!) for squishy realism. Hankey’s Toys specializes in BIG: from pretty damn large, to super large, to OMG-how-can-that-person-still-walk-afterward large realistic dildos—but they offer a (more average-size) Xtra-Small series too.
  • Looking for less-expensive? Blush Novelties products are affordable for platinum silicone (and they make some damn powerful vibes too): Like, cheap, dual-density realistic silicone? Hell yeah!
  • Lovense is renowned for their strong app-controlled vibes; the Lush (2 or 3) pink-tail vibrator by Lovense is most popular, though I would recommend against believing overblown pornography performances, trying to make you think anyone wearing a Lush will suddenly have wild vaginal orgasms because of it. The Lush is a fun teasing toy, with a great app, if you are looking for sexy controlled fun; you might consider the Ferri instead for anyone with a clit who doesn’t orgasm easily from vaginal penetration (that’s most people with clits, not all). Or, the Edge 2 is a strong prostate stimulation vibrator to sit and rock on. Mass-produced in China.
  • Oxballs makes hands-down the most comfortable penis rings & ball rings out there, in platinum silicone. Also cool things like nipple-suction tunnels, intense anal stretchers & PigHole tunnel plugs, and more “fetish” items like silicone urethral sounds.
  • Fleshlight and Fleshjack are known for their canister masturbation sleeves/strokers, but the company also makes silicone dildos: the fantasy-themed Freaks series, plus the Fleshjack Boys series of lifecast porn-star cocks which look very realistic and feel somewhat realistic (try dual-density silicone, though, for better lifelike feel).
  • Penis extenders, in body-safe silicone! Blissfull Creations and Sensual Extensions have the best reputation for making penis extenders in skin-safe platinum silicone: just look at the customer reviews to read about (and see!) how well Blissfull’s different extenders fit onto real shafts. The product descriptions are detailed, with precise size info & how to measure the penis the silicone extender will fit over! Unlike Vixen Creations’ extenders, these are tailored so that (if you measure accurately) the toy will stay on without a potentially awkward ball-strap.


There are many small fantasy dildo makers and Etsy stores out there, but these are the ones that I feel most confident recommending. All shops use skin-safe, platinum silicone for their dildos & other sex toys (like butt plugs, silicone penis strokers, squishies to rub off on clitorally, FtM penetrables, and even “teenies” mini dildos). These are unique, very colorful, and handmade fantasy dildos all! For a listing of clitoral grinding silicone toys, find a detailed list here.

Shops are US-based unless otherwise noted.

Sexual Health & Safer Sex

Safe toys are one thing, but sexual wellness of course extends into sex with other human beings too! Sex should be very pleasurable, but of course STIs are a risk no matter what, and unwanted pregnancy is a risk for many people. Stay safe, treat yourself well, and check out these resources for:

  • First line of defense: Condoms. I love Lucky Bloke, and I’ve been buying from them for almost five years, to get thinner and/or better-fitting condoms. The sampler packs are very helpful if you don’t know what size is best; and the dimensions for each & every condom are present in its listing. In my experience, lots of guys who require a bigger condom don’t even realize that the average-size ones they’re using are NOT supposed to cut off so much sensation, nor should the condom start slipping off during hard thrusting (which a condom will do if it’s too tight around the base of the penis shaft. That’s scary). Lucky Bloke also only carries safe lubricants too: nothing with glycerin or propylene glycol, which can throw off vaginal pH & facilitate micro-tears anally too. Lucky Bloke is a small business based in Washington, and their customer service is excellent! My experience buying from them described here. Do note that for new partners whose STI status you’re unaware of: infections may be transmitted via oral sex too, not just penetration.
  • STI testing: STDCheck.com (Get $15 off by clicking this link) is a well-established, US-based service that uses FDA-approved tests. You do not have to talk to anyone, or wait around getting these approved by a medical provider; it’s automatic, and very discreet. The 10-test panel is quite comprehensive and covers STIs like herpes-simplex-1, a very common & incurable virus, that other panels may not. You order the test(s) you want online, then visit a walk-in lab during business hours, whenever you want, to give your sample. Quest Diagnostics (they’re like the Walgreens of lab testing, tons of locations) and other major lab-test services are included, so there are tons of location options. Then, you get individual test-by-test result notifications as they come in, starting as early as 12 hours after you give your blood/urine samples, and with 2 days max. result time. It’s fast, which takes a lot of stress while waiting for results. Or get more variety with their sister site, HealthLabs.com (15% off link here), which offers STI testing plus sex-hormone testing, general wellness tests, etc. in the same order—you choose what you need.
  • Are you vaccinated against HPV? No standard STI tests cover human papilloma virus (HPV), which causes all cervical cancer, and is the only reason why tissue is yanked out of the cervix during Pap smears. HPV-16, HPV-18 and other variants can also cause throat cancer, penile cancer, colorectal (anal) cancer, if your body is unable to clear the virus; while HPV-6 and 10, etc. cause genital warts. The first HPV vaccine was approved in the US in 2007 for people assigned female AB, and in 2009 for people assigned male AB. It’s more likely you weren’t offered it if you’re in your mid-30s and older. In the US, the anti-HPV vaccine Gardasil-9 is currently FDA-approved for anyone up to 45 years old, and can be obtaining by making appointments at major pharmacies like Walgreens or CVS: it is a 3-shot regimen for full protection, that’s 3 appointments over 6 months. If you’d like to test whether you have an active HPV infection vaginally, Everlywell.com sells mail-in test kits with about 2-weeks turnaround time to get results.
  • SUPPORT reproductive rights & abortion access. Abortion is healthcare that can save women’s and people with uteruses’ lives or mental health, and allow more stable home environments for existing children. If you agree, donate to your local abortion funds, to help services remain available as long as possible and to help disadvantaged women/AFABs get the care they need. The abortion pill works up to 10-11 weeks gestational age (≈ 6 weeks after a missed period), and prescriptions can be obtained online without an in-person visit. Online resources like Plan C provide a wealth of information about pill access, including creative solutions like using a mail forwarder with a California address to get pills from a California telehealth (virtual only, no in-person visit required) provider shipped to any US state whose legislature wants to restrict your body.

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  1. Even porous TPR/TPE penis toys, which are in the “lesser evil” category: they’re nontoxic, but require more care because they can begin to let bacteria & mold grow if they’re not cleaned thoroughly right after use or they’re left in direct sunlight, too much heat & humidity, etc.

12 thoughts on “Where to Shop: From Vanilla to Fantasy Sex Toys”

  1. This is really helpful! I really had no idea about where to go for trusted quality products. I really love how you separated out the different categories too.

  2. Thank you for posting such a comprehensive list! I know so many people who don’t know where to shop for the products they want (besides Amazon), and now I can just send them this link 🙂

    • I’m glad to help! And thanks so much for sharing! I love supporting smaller retailers—especially ones who sell for fair prices and who take pride in selecting quality toys.

  3. Hodgepodge Entourage would have never been googled had it not been for this article!! I purchased 5 teenie squishes to get an idea of softness/firmness that would be more to my tastes. I really wanted miniatures of both of the sleeves as they would be amazing for Vulva attention. She normally doesn’t do that so, yea! She’s got a super fan now 🤩

  4. Okay, first off this site is AMAZING. I haven’t been sucked into a website like this since Wikipedia, lol. (I’ve got so many tabs open!) I’ve technically been buying toys for years, but I do it so rarely I still don’t really know what I want. I have a feeling that’ll change once I go through this site. So thanks for that!

    Now here’s my problem: I very much need to stick to cash for my purchases. I know it’s sad in this day and age, but it’s for personal reasons. So far the only toy site I’ve found that’s compatible with this IS Amazon. Do you know of any others? And if not, what makes these sites so discreet?

    Thanks in advance!

    • Hi, thank you so much for the compliment!!!

      With Amazon the concern is the supply chain: whether the makers and all vendors can be trusted to tell the truth about materials. Amazon selling is honestly a cut-throat world, where the lowest price wins; so that doesn’t leave much room for quality control.

      Have you considered a prepaid credit card? You could buy a Visa or Mastercard gift card with cash, and then use that at a reputable retailer.

  5. Love that you included info about the STI testing and HPV vax and abortion access! As always, so very comprehensive in the best ways!


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