Dual Pleasure Strap Ons Critical Guide

Dual pleasure: It’s a goal I’ve seen over and over again when new strap-on harness buyers wonder, How can my partner enjoy penetrating me while wearing a strap-on harness? “Double pleasure” dildos are the first option you’ll probably see offered: And vibrating double dildos (also called “strapless strap-ons”) do have advantages — as well as drawbacks. They’re one solution to “How does a strap on pleasure the wearer?” But there are other solutions too: Clitoral & vaginal orgasms during strap-on sex can come from vibration, from friction & grinding, and from vaginal fullness and pressure. I’ll describe how my favorite filling strap-on sex toy unites all 3. 💥

I take a no-bullshit, critical approach to sex toys, and do my darndest to recommend the current best products. That means no porous TPE dildos or toxic PVC strapons, no wired remote controls, and only rechargeable and waterproof vibrators. (It’s 2021, say “no” to 1990s-style sex toys!) In my 5 years as a pro reviewer, I’ve seen strap-on sex toys improve, happily, as I got more into harness play. In this dual pleasure strap on guide, I’ll cover double ended strap-on dildos, to clit stimulators in a strap on harness, to my personal favorite solution for blended orgasms while strapping it on. My experiences draw from both “pegging” and “girl-on-girl” play with vibrating double dildos. I’ll keep updating this guide as new best dual pleasure strap on options come on the market & I gain more fun times using them!

Strapless Strap-Ons: Pros and Cons

Summary: Strapless strap-ons are one avenue for dual pleasure, best suited for play where the two partners’ pelvic floors are being ground against each other. The movement, the friction, allows for dual pleasure here. And your bodies’ closeness helps fight gravity. Without the extra support of a harness, penetration from behind will be difficult; and anal play (“pegging”) is much more challenging. “Strapless strapon” dual-pleasure dildos do fit inside some harnesses well: depending on the harness. (Compatible harnesses listed in this section, later.)

I tell you what, it felt like we were doing some real contortions by the end of the strapless play.

My experience: My first strapless strapon session with a bi female partner was indeed strapless. I’ll tell you about it, the limitations of using a strapless dildo without a harness, and why I would recommend a harness for sure for anal penetration.

She appeared in a pair of thigh-high leather boots, a bag of toys (and other implements) in tow. We talked about what she wanted to explore, and the toys she liked best. A silicone vibrating strapless dildo was her favorite; she’d used it with her boyfriend, too, but found it hard to sustain. She needed a girl to play with, so there I was: the receiver, of the longer dildo end.

So how to use a strapless strap-on? We learned:

  1. She went first, pulling the toy out, and turning on the first vibration function.
  2. Then, she inserted the small end inside her vagina… and approached me.
  3. We moved our butts closer together, knees bent; I was reclining on my elbows.
  4. Finally, she reached down and started easing the dildo end into my pussy.
  5. (I’d pulled out some lube before we started and was wet already!) Lube matters.
  6. She began rocking her hips, gently… pushing forward into me.

Ass-to-ass we laid still, both on our backs and propped up by our elbows, as she ground the dildo into me. The vibrations got speeded up quickly. I enjoyed watching her, especially as she got more into it, moving faster and then transitioning to being on her knees. She thrust deeper, and this toy (about 6 inches long) was a traditionally firm silicone vibrator: very little give. My cervix started to feel uncomfortable, from the hardness and depth, while she was arching her back forward, to try to keep the toy inside herself. Fighting gravity with force. As fun as the action was to view, I asked her to go slower, like before; and managed to orgasm a second time. (The first had been very quick, from the novelty & the sexiness of the scene.) The G-spot action of this particular toy had been a little lacking for me too, so we continued to other products in the sex toy bag: She came really hard as I rubbed her Satisfyer Pro 2 gently on her clit.

The moral: I’m glad I had the strapless strapon test experience, but it’s a type of play that’s hard to sustain physically! (Kind of like suction-cup dildoing, tbh.) Pros of strapless double ended dildos: For F-F play where dual pleasure dildos are being employed, the intimacy of going it strapless is definitely an advantage. You can feel their skin directly on yours, their body warmth. And you don’t have to stop and take the time to put on the harness and tighten the straps! But… that sexiness may very well be outweighed by the Cons of 100% strapless dildos: intended for everyone’s pleasure, but possibly harder for both partners (literally and figuratively!). The back-arching, the repositioning, the lack of curvature in the dildo. And as for anal, I know I’ve had enough trouble easing softer silicone dildos into my 2 pegging partners’ butts and getting a good angle while I was wearing a great harness, so I can’t even imagine wanting to go that route unstrapped: their butt would pull out my “pony” (the vaginal side of the dildo), especially in the easiest pegging position, from behind/doggy style.

Strapless strapon double sided dildo - difficult
Fighting gravity: Where my hand is, that’s where you *need* another person’s orifice to keep the dildo thrusting, not falling out.

Vibrating Double Dildos List: Body-Safe Silicone

After my first double dildo session, I surveyed vibrating double dildos for strapon sex: What are the best double sided dildos? Intense scrutiny ensued! Again, all choices are 100% body-safe and functionally nonporous materials. Here I list a few non-vibrating dual ended dildos too… But will note I think vibration is much more orgasmic, especially when I’ve been the one strapping it on. See options #1 to 5 especially.

Strap On Men Bendable Vibrating Dildo, posable pony
Option #1’s pony bends a lot, and stays when you release it!
  1. Strap On Me Vibrating Bendable Strap-On ($129.99 here): This is the best pleasure for the wearer: The Strap On Me vibrates AND the wearable bulb has a super-flexible neck, that you curve to fit the wearer’s vulva (and then it stays put). This makes a world of difference for good positioning and comfortable wear. The bulb is nicely rounded and medium sized. It’s neither too long, nor poking me. The Strap-On-Me Bendable’s neck vibrates too, for clit stimulation! I’ve strapped on and received this dildo as well. When taking it, I think the head is just prominent enough for good G-spot stimulation when you add in the vibrations. The Strap-On-Me Bendable Vibrating Dildo rumbles (grrrr!), and its remote control lets you turn on/off 3 separate motors: in the dildo tip, in the lower shaft, and in the vaginal bulb. Again, the easy adjustability is what sets this product apart, and I hope to see more vibrating strapless dildos like it. My only “meh” about this Strap-On-Me double dildo is that yeah, the shaft is kinda flexible, but (like almost

A limitation of double ended dildos is that they’re firm for stability and if they have a vibrating motor core. As someone who is deeply into lifelike feel, I usually want more softness! Both as the harness-wearer and as the receiver! If you’re more sensitive, softer silicone allows for more comfort (especially during fast thrusting!). It’s more natural-feeling; like how realistic silicone dildos all involve super-soft platinum silicone. Other users will love firm pressure; it all depends on you and your body’s preferences. Because I do like it softer inside, I came up with a solution, next! ⬇️🎉

My Favorite Dual Pleasure Strap On Aids

How do I gain the most pleasure during strap-on sex? Thru vaginal fullness, soft “fleshy” silicone, and G-spot stimulation! DAMN if this toy combination doesn’t do it all for me inside a strap-on harness!!! ❗ I call this double pleasure aid the “Lush Squeeze”: a grouping of the

It’s like they were made for each other! It was a glorious day when I pulled out my gear, realized I enjoyed the Lush inside a harness, but… it kept wanting to slip out and wasn’t thick enough for me. (Lush’s tail is so skinny, and the bulb’s wide part is very short.) So I slotted these two 💯 sex toys together, put them in my harness briefs, and started grinding away. The stretching and vibration together are awesome for me.

Strap On Harness Pleasure for Her_ Lovense Lush + G squeeze vaginal plug, in Temptasia Briefs, with Avant D16 dildo & Bumpher
OMG the fullness + G-spot stim. (Dildo pictured is the Avant D15 with a Bumpher attached.)
I used this combo humping a pillow at first, then tried it a few days later while actually strapping on. It makes me want to come even when I’m walking around with it in (Lush alone does not), but when I’m fully inserted (deep thrust)… Awwww, that’s the best.🤯💦

IMO the Lovense Lush + G squeeze together are everything I wanted in a vibrating double dildo (as the harness wearer). There’s no awkwardness with trying to position a double dildo right, no hardness inside my body, and I can pick whatever dildo to use on my partner / swap out using multiple dildos in the same play session. It’s less limiting that way. Due to the bulk of the vaginal plug, I do recommend a harness with more support underneath: brief-style is best.

If you don’t need a filling toy / prefer slimmer things vaginally, the Lush by itself can be worn while strapping on! Here’s a fuller review of what Lush can do, including Lovense’s awesome app control.

Another vaginal plug I’ve tried is the Oxballs Honcho, which I enjoy because it’s thick (for the stretch!) but not too long. So it stays in well if you have support. And I’ve tried butt plugs like the Forto F-60 Spade plug inside too! But both those don’t give me orgasms during harness play, not like the vibrating and filling G squeeze + Lush.

Top Strap-On Harness Summary

What are the best harnesses that can take double dildos & other toys? A list of high-quality harnesses, focused on clit & vaginal pleasure for the harness wearer:

  • Spareparts Joque. Top of the line.
  • Packer Briefs by CalEx. The most supportive & most stimulating cheaper harness. Multiple sizes are available, and I found they matched the size of women’s underwear I wear (M); if you’re a large, you can choose to either go with the M/L size for tight support or for L/XL for a less-constrictive waist. The waistband is very wide so they hold dildos up well. You can pull the band up to make ’em look like booty short! I appreciate both the support they provide for vaginal toys and the vibrator pocket that runs between my vag and clit (see the next section of this guide for clitoral pleasure during strap-on play).
  • Spareparts Tomboi are higher-quality briefs!
  • Spareparts Sasha has a sexy boyshort look, with ruches that hug your butt checks on the back side.

All the above let you choose your own dildo to insert: Up to just over 2 inches diameter (pretty thick). They’re just not for monster dildos.

A thick (2″ D) Oxballs Buddy squeezing thru Joque’s stretchy O-ring; the fabric is supportive. (This photo got censored on Instagram despite the underwear I wore under the harness: I lost followers for MONTHS as a direct result!)

There are multiple styles of strap-on harness: (1) “Beginner” harnesses (read: cheaper ones) have backpack-esque nylon straps and, often, interchangeable O-rings. They’re really not made for comfort, and often lack bullet vibe slots that might contain a vibrator for the wearer’s pleasure. (2) Brief style harnesses are great for dual pleasure (with vag-having wearer): They have more support below (under the wearer’s pelvic floor) so they’re good for holding vaginal plugs or vaginal vibrators in. These include a slot for a bullet vibrator outside too, for clit stimulation. (3) Jock-style harnesses have a triangular front, some coverage in the front half of the pelvic floor, and two straps that fit under the wearer’s ass cheeks. (4) Leather harnesses are often jock-style. (But may be more intense, like full body ones. See Aslan Leather for clit-having wearers, or Mr. S Leather for penis-having ones.) (5) Vac-U-Lock harnesses may be jock-style or more supportive for giant-ass dildos. These are distinct because their O-ring holds in a Vac-U-Lock plug that fits inside a Vac compatible dildo (making really large toys more secure). Vac harnesses position the dildo higher up on the wearer’s pubic mound; and therefore, don’t provide much pelvic floor support or vibrator slots low enough that the vibrator is directly touching anyone’s clitoris.

Some harnesses look really stylin’ at first but then you realize they provide no pleasure to the wearer! I tried out the Regal Empress harness once, for example, and I was like, “What is the point of this?!” Look at how high up the dildo rides, while I need more stimulation underneath! Sad panda.

Clitoral Stimulators During Strap On Sex

Can you have a clitoral orgasm during strapon sex? Yes, absolutely; without penetration for the harness wearer. Make sure your harness has a pouch to hold a small vibrator: a.k.a. a “bullet slot.” Preferably a slot that is close to the clitoris, rather than way up residing on the wearer’s mons pubis like so. Some people can get off by just grinding clitorally, but vibration makes it easier!

My favorite clit-vibing harness time is the Intense Travel Vibe in the big pouch in the Packer Briefs’ crotch. The Intense Travel Vibe is a strong bullet for a very good price, and just the right length to fit in the briefs’ compartment. In the realm of bullet vibrators, “intense” is no lie here: the Intense Travel Mini overpowers the rumbly We-Vibe Tango X ($79), and starts strong. Be wearing your harness first, then reach in and position the vibrator — and, hopefully, its tip right around your clitoris. (If you try putting in the vibe and then put the briefs on, it will probably fall out!)

Clitoral pleasure in strap-on harness_Intense Travel Mini bullet vibrator in Temptasia Briefs harness briefs
Finger where the Intense Travel vibe is purrring away!

SpareParts Joque has 2 slots above and below the dildo hole that will just barely fit in the BMS Essential Power Bullet. Use the lower slot, and the vibrations are close to (but not directly touching) the clit nearby. However, instead I recommend fitting a bullet vibe into the open V-shaped pouch so it’s parallel to the wearer’s labia. Much stronger vibration contact that way, and orgasms are less frustrating to achieve.

The Bumpher may be a clit stimulator, kind of, if the dildo hole in your strap-on harness is lower down (like it may be in the Spareparts Joque).The bottom bump is at the transitional space between pubic mound and labia, so if you’re angling yourself the right way and grinding, you might get a little stimulation. But, really the Bumpher is about shielding the dildo-wearer’s mound from hard bashing. If you’re thrusting fast and your dildo base is hard, pain can happen! The Bumpher is softer silicone that provides padding, cushioning.

Choosing Dual Pleasure Toys with Your Partner

Both partners want pleasure, so it’s smart to shop together and talk about what you both are looking for! The amount of body-safe silicone dildos to choose from is crazy nowadays. The primary dildo-receiver will be affected by the toy’s shape, and size, and how it feels; while the harness wearer may have opinions on what their new dick should look like too, and what color they’d like it to be! Let them know how excited you are to start trying out the new toys… But which styles will work for you both?

If you’re new to strap-on sex, especially anally, remember to start smaller! (“Don’t let your hole get greedy.”) I cover beginner pegging dildos and anal training more in this article. 1 inch diameter is a good starting point, and remember the lubricant.

Pleasure and exploration can be so hot together, with a willing partner… It’s all about trying new things, discovering what works and discarding the rest! Enjoy.


NOTE

6 thoughts on “Dual Pleasure Strap Ons Critical Guide”

  1. Was there meant to be a link to a particular sheath in the bit about the Strap On Me? I’ve been looking for good options that might add softness and possibly a little length without too much girth, but quality sheath options seems kind of sparse.

    Reply
  2. Have you tried something along the lines of the Transthetics Joystick? The harness method the creator came up with seems ingenious – a loop in your underwear to put the head of a vibrator (or dildo if it has a segment that could hold a loop), stabilizing the toy between your pubic bone and the band of the underwear the loop is sewn into. I would really like to see more toys using this harness style or method!

    Reply
    • I think it’s a really interesting concept. There are good reviews, and mixed reviews; I saw one Youtube reviewer who unfortunately did not talk about using it to penetrate a partner, but did say that he tried the “modify your underwear to make a harness with loop” method, and his opinion was that the resulting harnes wasn’t tight (enough for stability during penetration). That makes sense to me physically, it’s a lot of shaft that’s not attached very securely. Even double dildos that are inserted vaginally have been really wiggly for me in many cases!

      So I’m not saying that the underloop loop method is a total failure, or that it won’t work for everyone, but that I’d want more security, as well as clit stimulation farther back.

      Reply
  3. Can you use the Strap on Me (or another “strapless strap on”) WITH a harness, just for extra support? Like, can the dildo for the receiver just pass through the harness, be supported, and then also be inside the giver? (I thought that’s what you were doing with the G Squeeze and Lush, but I think you simply have 4 individual products in that harness!)

    Reply
  4. Yes, and that’s how I would recommend using the Strap-on-Me strapless (or any other strapless, tbh). It will work with any harness that is open on both sides of the O-ring to let the dildo go through, so it will work with the Spareparts Joque or any other Spareparts or Aslan harness (and I believe with the Packer Gear briefs as well).

    The G Squeeze + Lush combo can be used with any harness, as they don’t go through the O-ring.

    If you can afford the Joque, it’s a great harness that’s easy to put on, very adjustable and secure, durable, and easy to clean. I haven’t used the Packer Gear briefs, but if they’re like the Temptasia briefs (which I think were discontinued), the briefs will be even easier to put on but feel less secure in use and obviously not adjustable (and probably less durable).

    Reply

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