$30 Dildo Round-Up: Blush Novelties Ruse Jammy, Rock Candy Suga Daddy 7″, & SI Novelties Major Dick Commando Silicone Suction Cup Dildo Reviews

I often have simple tastes: a cheap suction cup dildo has beaten a more expensive toy for me on so many occasions. Affordable, body-safe silicone dildos are my bread and butter when it comes to sex toys. (Though of course I do sometimes enjoy a more lavish banquet.)

Enter three wallet-friendly (priced from $26 to $33) suction cup dildos that SheVibe has added this year: the Blush Ruse Jammy, the Rock Candy Suga Daddy toys, and the SI Novelties Major Dick Commando 7″ (henceforth known as THAT thing).

I love one of these, am fine with another, and think the third is not actually usable as a sex toy. Let’s dig in to this trio of the good, the not-bad, and the fuck-ugly!

The Good: Blush Ruse Jammy Silicone Suction Cup Dildo

The Ruse Jammy fits my one criterion for a top-drawer toy: it makes me come really hard, and then want to keep going for more. 

I lube it up with some Sliquid Silk hybrid lube (my go-to for highly textured dildos) and riding Jammy is the kind of broad, intense screwing that I like most. If you want firmer pressure in a realistic shape (and aren’t averse to thicker toys!), then Jammy is 100% worth picking up.

It’s big by normal-penis standards—1.8″ max. diameter and 7.5″ insertable length—and it’s textured. The finish is satiny like all Blush silicone, but Jammy has so much skin-like detail that moving it creates definite drag. My bits are endlessly confused by slick, glossy toys, so Jammy is my jam.

Prior to testing, I’d expected to have mixed feelings about the Ruse Jammy. I thought it would be in a firmer silicone—the same density as the earlier Ruse dildos, like the Magic Stick, which I find too hard to really ride (though grinding on the latter is a go). 

But surprise! Jammy isn’t your traditional cheap silicone dildo: it has layers. “It’s dual-density,” was my first thought when I felt Jammy. And then: “Aha!!!”

I’d been wondering how a silicone dong this large could retail for much under $50 (Jammy is currently priced at $30 at Peepshow Toys), and I had to squeeze Jammy to realize why. Just like Blush’s Silicone Willy’s line, the Ruse Jammy is actually three sections. Starting from the outside:

1. First there’s the satin-smooth platinum silicone, in a not-hard density (like the around-15-shore-durometer range that Vixen single density toys fall in).
2. A layer of ABS plastic, for stability.
3. Then there’s air in the middle, fully enclosed by the outer layer of silicone + suction cup. 

Because the outer layer of platinum silicone—the most expensive toy material—is only maybe half an inch thick, the whole dildo costs less. Now, I love a good bargain, but the thing I’ve bought for less has to be quality. It has to not seem cheap, or flimsy in the case of this hollow dildo. Would Jammy’s air space present a problem?

In my experience, no, absolutely not. The hard plastic inside Jammy keeps the dildo totally stable; it’s just barely flexible even though the center is open space. In fact, it bends less than a traditional dual-density silicone dildo.

That’s why Jammy’s curve is essential for me: if the shaft was totally straight, it wouldn’t hit my G-spot and I wouldn’t be able to bend the toy to hit where I wanted, either. In fact, I own a Silicone Willy’s 6″ Dildo and, though I like it occasionally, the shorter, straight shaft guarantees that it’ll never be among my favorites. I just can’t quite get the right angle.

Not so with Jammy: its curve is perfect. When stuck to a wall, Jammy has just the right amount of bent for me. The ridge tugs on my G-spot as I move my hips, while the thickness of the shaft spreads my lips apart just like a very well-endowed lover would. 

That said, no one is going to hold Jammy and think it’s realistic in the same way VixSkin dual-density is. Jammy’s silicone, even though the head has a bit of softness, doesn’t have the squish that a traditional dual-density toy does. I like Jammy for those times when I want more pressure—for that half of the month when my vag isn’t so incredibly sensitive. 

That’s why I plan on alternating between Jammy and my other suction-cupped, big-dick favorite, the NS ColourSoft 8″ (review of it and the smaller ColourSoft 5″ dildo here). ColourSoft 8″ is squishy, flexible, twistable, vs. Jammy’s medium firmness. My choice depends on my mood. 

Finally, Jammy’s suction cup is good but not stellar. It’s a little too flat, not concave enough, to hold the toy’s large frame up for long when it’s left alone on a wall. In use it’ll stick great to flat surfaces but occasionally come detached from the wall (unless your paint is super glossy?).

Blush Ruse Jammy Silicone Dildo Takeaway

If you’re a fan of thick, realistic dildos—and you like a little more pressure too—then I am absolutely going to tell you to consider buying the Ruse Jammy. It was among my top three favorite new dildos of 2018¹ because I have screwed it until I couldn’t hold my weight up anymore, the orgasms were so much. 

Is Jammy the most realistic? No, it’s much firmer pressure outside than the skin of a penis. It’s not luxurious in the same way a triple-density silicone dildo is, for sure. But for under $30? Most definitely 5/5 stars. 

• Highlights: So amazingly cheap for a toy this size, without feeling too cheap. Forgiving, satin smooth silicone with loads of veiny texture over an ABS plastic shell. Gotta love the G-spot curve!
• Suction Cup Strength: 7/10; works great with smooth surfaces, occasionally falls off slightly textured ones
• Dimensions: 7.5″ insertable length, 1.8″ diameter throughout
• Price: $29.99 for black or purple
• Alternatives: Silicone Willy’s for affordable, smaller-sized toys with a similar feel; SquarePeg Nathan if you want it softer, & more fleshy, plus 100% handmade in the USA; VixSkin Maverick uber-squishy dual-density; ColourSoft realistic dildos for semi-soft silicone (and darn good suction cups!)

The Not-Bad: Rock Candy Suga Daddy 7″ Silicone Suction Cup Dildo

If you’re like me and you’ve ever thought, Wow the ridges on that unicorn horn look great, but you know what? I wish it had a cock head on top! then you’re in luck, the Rock Candy Suga Daddy is clearly the affordable dildo for you. 

But wait, What? You’re not that person? In that case the Rock Candy Suga Daddy dildos—which come in 4 different sizes—are a cheap, body-safe, and soft option that’s not too phallic. The silicone is probably around 10 shore durometer, so it’s soft-ish but not squishy, meaning I can still do cool things like bend it easily in half with one hand. 

The silicone in my Suga Daddy 7″ reminds me a lot of that of the BMS Factory Addiction suction cup dildos: like the glow-in-the-dark Brandon/Luke and ridgy, dotted Tom/Ben fantasy dildo I reviewed a few months back. Same firmness, same slick matte finish. If you dislike friction in your toying—if you want your dildo to really glide—then this is the kind of matte silicone you’ll want.

The Rock Candy Suga Daddy 7″ is too slick for my taste, but the softness and the texture are appealing (if not mind-blowing). Like with my Split Peaches Unicorn Horn, I get the most pleasure from twisting the Suga Daddy dildo 90 degrees side to side while just barely thrusting. The Suga Daddy’s rounded humps stimulate gently, smoothly. The corona tugs on my G-spot—lightly. Really, in the end the cock head that I thought was interesting—some might say “out of place”—feature of the Suga Daddy turns out to be overshadowed. The third section of the dildo, about an inch below the coronal ridge, sticks out as much as the corona itself. So the Rock Candy Suga Daddy isn’t a G-spotting dildo for me, but instead an “overall experience” dildo.

Using the Rock Candy Suga Daddy as a suction cup dildo, I only feel the high point on each ridged bump. Again, that’s OK but not orgasmic for me, and I always have the sense that I’m missing out when I’m not twisting this toy side to side. 

Rock Candy Suga Daddy Dildo Takeaway

The Rock Candy Suga Daddy Silicone Dildo is soft, slick, and flexible, with gentle textures that are best served sloooowly twisted and thrust. It’s cute, and it’s fun enough to look at—not to mention the very reasonable price—so I can see myself recommending it even though I’m not dying over it myself. (MORE G-SPOT STIM over here, please.) I am pretty pumped up about the variety of sizes—I love it when companies cater to different tastes like that. 

• Highlights: Soft-ish silicone, very slick matte finish, gentle speed-bump texture, subdued corona. 
• Suction Cup Strength: 9/10, unlikely to fall off during use
• Dimensions: Suga Daddy 7″ has 6″ insertable length and 1.5″ diameter (right above the base); other Suga Daddy dils range from 1.5″ diameter and 4.5″ insertable to a very large 2.25″ diameter and 8.5″ insertable 
• Price: $26.99 here for the average-sized 7″; other Suga Daddy dils are $22.99, $35.99, and $45.99 depending on size
• Alternatives: Split Peaches Unicorn Horns for head-less swirls (in firmer silicone; review here); Uberrime Jellyfish 2.0 for shaft texture with a bigger, popping head; Funkit NoFrillDo R for an inexpensive, firmer, glossy dil with a swirly pattern; Tantus Echo and Echo Super Soft (I like the latter!) for loads of bigger ridges

The Fuck-Ugly: SI Novelties Major Dick Commando 

I burst out laughing the first time I saw Major Dick, the Commando dong, listed on SheVibe. Later I showed a pic of it to a group of open-minded friends, and I asked for opinions: “Would you buy this??? If so, why?”

Sarcastic responses included: “Because I love my country!” “It’s great for your next hunting trip—never be bored in a tree stand again!” and “The camo makes it so discreet, you can put it anywhere and no one will ever know!”

I’m not here to judge anyone who thinks people in uniform are hot, that’s cool. But…Major Dick is fuck-ugly. Olive drab—yikes.

My opinion on Major Dick didn’t improve when I noticed it had a very visible, raised seam down the front. Seams aren’t uncommon with liquid injection molded silicone, but this one sticks out so frickin’ much. Plus Major Dick had an even cheaper feel—cheaper in the worst sense of the word—because of the strong packaging smell that lingered on it. (Clearly this camo dong had been sitting in storage for a while.) Silicone, though functionally non-porous, can sometimes retain strong odors. Again, the smell didn’t necessarily mean the toy was unsafe—it didn’t smell like a shower curtain, like unsafe PVC does. Instead, I just had to do some extra-thorough cleaning: soap and water, and rubbing alcohol, and more soap and water, and finally boiling for good measure. 

And then I set out to test it…for science, obvs. But that didn’t last long. I’d expected the camo dick to be the typical cheap-o silicone dil, firm with a strong suction cup. I was OK with that—I hoped it’d be a situation like with the Cloud 9 Pro Sensual Dildos (review here), where they weren’t the best for me but at least I’d have some fun doing the testing, and then move on. NOT SO WITH GI DICK. That seam…ugh. Seriously, SI Novelties: just because you manufacture low-cost toys doesn’t mean you should totally neglect quality control.

I screwed Major Dick for two full minutes before I gave up and decided enough was enough. Usually I’ll pull through with a toy I don’t like and give it at least three chances, but…no. The seam grates on my nerves. It’s unfortunate because the shape of the toy is functional enough, and the silicone finish is smooth, just a little draggy. Also, the suction cup is fairly good. But I kept returning to that repeated feeling of slight irritation as the line down Major Dick’s center grazed my urethra with each thrust. 

So you’ll understand why I can’t recommend the Major Dick Commando 7″ Dildo as a dildo, even to folks who think military apparel is smoking hot. And as a gag gift…well, I don’t know. That’s your call, whether it’s worth the $31. Personally I’d recommend a Blush Performance Silicone Camo Cock Ring before anything else if you need more olive + brown in your life. Stick it over the cheap silicone dildo of your choice (I suggest the Addiction Mark), and for the same price to a couple bucks more than Major Dick, you come out with a usable dildo plus a quality cock ring.  

Major Dick Takeaway

Major Dick is true to its name: it’s a major dick in the worst sense of the word. The plastic smell, the cheap packaging, the fact that it looks like two silicone halves put together after they’d cured, and the huge seam that results…they all add up to make this toy feel gross to me, rather than silly and funny. Save your money—unless you don’t care about the $31 and you want to be an asshole by giving one to a friend as a bachelor(ette) party gift or similar. (For the record, I endorse this particular kind of assholery.)

• Highlights (Lowlights?): Horrible seam, feels kinda cheap overall. Good only if you think dick jokes are hilarious. I intend to keep my Major Dick as a paperweight.
• Suction Cup Strength: Maybe 7/10? Good concave indent, but it fell off the wall once during that 2 minutes I tested it. 
• Price: $30.99 here, if you really need one 
• Alternatives: Look, here’s a vast array of silicone dildos under $40 and I’d recommend any of them over Major Dick! Check out the “Realistic” section of my Suction Cup Dildo Guide for a breakdown of better hands-free options. 

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1. The others being another Blush Novelties toy, the Avant D5 & D6 (review here); and the Uberrime Helios (with the Uberrime Splendid close behind).