2024 Top 5 Sex Toys – Best New + Body-Safe finds!

Dozens of boxes of vibrators & dildos (plus occasional butt plugs and lubes!) arrive at my door annually – and all have undergone the sorting. If you’re looking for 2024’s best dildos, best clit suction toy, best couples’ sex toy, best vibrator for blended G-spot + clit stimulation, or best HANDS-FREE DILDO MOUNT, then keep reading for my top finds, carefully selected. As always, all products mentioned are body-safe, meaning they won’t degrade or harbor microbes like bacteria.

2024 Best New Dildos: Real Feel + Safe Silicone!

I hate that shitty porous dildo manufacturers coopted the term “real feel” for their cheap-ass material that literally breaks apart over time – so I’m taking it back.

The Solina dildos are real feel dildos that *are* body-safe, since they’re the most lifelike erection stand-ins I’ve encountered over a decade. And as platinum cured silicone, they repel water and germs, microscopically.

“Soooo much better” isn’t strong enough language to show what this means: I truly think they are the best realistic dildo even over the $600–$700 RealCocks, which might not even be fully silicone. The Solina Mega XL and XXL are the best-balanced dual-density silicone out there, hands-down. The Mega 2XL is my personal all-time favorite dildo, but I tend to like much thicker girth: go for the Mega XL (slightly girthy) or Mega “Large” (average thickness) if you’re into more normal sizing.

The new “with balls” models are fab too, with the Solina Spotta G-spotter being my most-used – it dominates the VixSkin Mustang, IMO.

With G-spot stimulation, the golden rule is: It’ll be better if you’re warmed up first, clitorally.🌺 For clit stimulation, my top sex toy of 2024 is a “clit suction” vibrator that is way more phenomenal than 2020’s viral Rose toy:

Best Clit Suction

This cute floral vibrator is no lightweight. 💪⚡The Zen Rose’s first speed is rumbly and 7/10 intense. And then it jumps in power,

So that by speed #3, I’m thinking about receiving head.

Unlike other Rose toys, the Zen’s petals spread wider so they’re not a total bitch to clean water-based lubricant out of – plus they stimulate better above and below the clitoris’ head, since they put out the deep vibration too. Like, I got a Lovense Tenera early 2024 ($119.00 price) that feels only 30% as strong as the Zen Rose ($49.99).

The Zen Rose, since it has vibration and air pulsation, has even made me set aside my We-Vibe Melt – a previous favorite sex toy from 2019 through 2023! The Melt only air-pulses, no rumbly vibration.

And for the best oral sex bundle for clit-owners, start with the Enhance oral simulator “pussy pump” with vibrating tongue, and then finish with the Zen Rose. The Enhance pump feels so lazily good, like good gentle cunnilingus. I just need a bit more rubbing up-and-down the vulva to cum hard, so the Zen Rose is the hardest finisher after an OMGGGGG edging intro. 🫨🤤🫠

Best Dual Vibrator (“Rabbit”) for G-Spot & Clitoral

Grrr-rrrrumbly and quaking. This is the second rabbit vibrator I’ve ever loved, out of 110 opened boxes thus far.

B/c: Better speed range than the We-Vibe Nova. This means the Wonderlust St-Tropez dual vibrator is gentler at first, gets more powerful to finish, and has more options in between. It possesses BMS Factory’s best-in-class control system: fully incremental control. You get to choose how strong the vibration is by pressing and holding, then releasing the button at will.

It’s comparably rumbly =deep vibration to the Nova. The St Tropez’s G-spot bulb is wider and more impressive. But, the clitoral stimulator in St Tropez is a bit shorter, not as curved. It works great for my not-long pelvic spacing, but likely won’t suit folks with long clit-to-vagina distances as the Nova continues to do well.

Best Sex-Cessories: Harnesses for Hands-free Play

Gadgets that’ll let you go hands-free for vaginal, anal, or clitoral:

• Dildo mount: 10/10 more comfortable and more stable than Liberator sex toy mounts that sell for $119–$169. The Lap Strap ($49.99) has long straps that fit around any thin pillow you own, then you stack one or two more pillows below it. Soft, and no hard edges to bang down on if you’re riding fast ‘n’ hard (like the T.O.M. mount is a hard box, nope). The suction cup docking plate of the Lap Strap is also better than a standard thigh harness, as it holds the dildo more upright.
• Hands-free wand holster: Wand vibrators in full-size form are exceptional for powerful clitoral vibration, but they r long. And sometimes you want to grind ur clit on the wand head, without needing to manage a 13-inch length in hand. I super enjoyed this combo when testing out the Maia Nala’s crunchy power: Strap it on and close my legs over it, easy.

New Fantasy Dildos I Love, 2024

2024 was the year I discovered how fan-fucking-tastic Uberrime’s fantasy designs have gotten – now fueled by the design work of Kat, formerly Sheep of Damn Average dildos.

I realized that alien dildos have always been the #1 most-sexy fantasy escape for me mentally, hotter than dragons or tentacles when I want something non-humanoid.

So the revamped smoothed + even more G-spot stimulating Big Damn Alien was… an otherwordly playtime, at first landing. Maybe I’m not thinking of being beamed up by a flying saucer… but of meeting a sapiosexual, highly evolved creature who will really fill my needs. The Big Damn Alien is damn wide, at 2.12″ diameter and really locks in with its final two ripple-rows. See the just Damn Alien for less imposing.

Or the Aliter for A-spotting + filling knottiness, or the Machina for snaky mech anal probing!

🤫🪄 Secret Best Mini-Wand, Coming 2025

I can’t say what this toy is yet. I’ve owned one for 6 weeks now, and it is soooooo good for – here’s your only hint – a small wand. This means it’s a liiiiittle bit longer than a bullet vibrator, but the handle is more grippable and the clitoral contact area is not pointy. 🙌 from my clit, which does not like pinpoint & sharp things.

Now, I like the Orion Petite Wand and think it’s super-strong for its size: but this new dood, it has more options. And, it’s fully coated in silicone, no gaps in a plastic handle.

It kicks ass and I’m using it more than my previous fave small power-tool, PalmPower Recharge, currently. Details as soon as it’s up for sale.

Worst Sex Toy Fails of 2024

In considering my best sex toys of 2024, I of course had to reconsider my biggest fails, too:

• The Womanizer Next “suction clit stimulator” costs $20 more than the Womanizer Premium, $219 cost – but is considerably weaker, has some gimmicky alternating suction function that barely sucks, and has the buzziest low-power vibration. Now, the Womanizer Premium 2 and Classic 2 are high-power and maybe worth the price, but the Next is a failure. It’s like how Womanizer released a $120 showerhead and then tried to make folks believe it’s like, anything different than you can find at your local Home Depot for half the price.
• Fun Factory’s ShareVibe Pro did have better vibration – stronger, rumblier, built-in – versus the old ShareVibe double dildo. But, at $169 yet no remote control, draggy silicone, and they’re just gaslighting us by saying that any double dildo is a secure vaginal wearable. Um…. the vagina is not a vacuum, it is not going to securely hold up a 7-inch dildo, there’s no way.
• Blush Blooming Bliss is a cutesy lil thing that would’ve been unobjectionable if it wasn’t marked up to $89.99 manufacturer’s price. The cheap-o vibration quality feels like two $10-retail vibrating bullets paired.
• The Lovense Pro sex machine costs $12 more than a Hismith Premium¹ yet feels like its motor lost 40 watts, doesn’t have adjustable stroke length, and it doesn’t have any other dildo attachment options or suction cup for sale. This is incredibly limiting given the $399 purchase price.

Thank You for Supporting Phal.Reviews – Dildo Reviews & Vibrator Guides, in 2024

Thank you for reading and supporting my work. Though I write under a pseudonym to protect my family’s privacy, I am a real (often too real 😱) woman in the USA, who’s occasionally aided by the feedback of my intimate partners, past & present.

This is what it feels like⬇️🖼️⬇️ to be an independent blogger trying their damn best to write honest reviews & critical feedback, in a world where 1.) unchecked monopolies (=Amazon) do everything they can to eliminate small indie businesses, who then have less capital to support honest reviewers; and 2.) certain buyers assume literally everyone who runs a review site is lying in order to make a quick buck, without bothering to read a reviewer’s particular insights (or lack thereof) and make an independent case-by-case judgment.

I’m proud that Phal.Reviews does not take paid posts, sponsorships, or any “influencer”-like things. My links to Peepshow Toys – which is the best supporter of my critical comparison guides – earn me a small percentage of each purchase, which is how I can eat and keep an OK roof over my head. (Also, buy coffee. Coffee is very important.) I also do side-jobs editing and writing in two different fields.

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1. Code PR10 discounts the $429 HIsmith Premium machine down to $387 – worth it if you like consistent f*cking.