Sex Toy Gift Guide 2021: Best Picks, 100% Body-Safe

Sex Toy gift guide 2020 best toys holly
What to choose?!?

When there are so many choices, what sex toy do you pick for your partner, lover, good friend, or yourself this holiday season? It’s a wide world of sex toys out there—and I’m not just talking about the monster dildos! If your partner’s open to trying new things, a toy is perfect for a Valentine’s Day gift, birthday, anniversary, etc.!

This sex toy gift guide rounds up my top picks to help you find the best for your partner’s / your own body—or simply explore hot new ideas. All products are comparatively tested against the best options in class: see my full vibrator guides and dildo guides for more extensive rankings.

First, I’m going to ask you to consider about the person you’re buying for: What body part(s) are you looking to stimulate / enhance?

This is crucial because everyone has different sexual tastes. So think about what you / your partner likes best, before buying! Let’s dive into awesome sex toys by anatomy, with a description of what each does. Every toy in this list is all body-safe, meaning it doesn’t contain porous materials that harbor bacteria and/or leach chemicals into your body.

G-Spot Toys

Pillow Talk Sassy: Rumbly, multi-purpose, great speed range. This deep-vibing G-spotter is amazing for clit stimulation too. The curved tip is so silky, and the shaft has a little flex, so it’s gentler while vibrating powerfully—if you want! Sassy’s fully adjustable speed control gives you access to the full range through a press & hold power button. My all-time favorite vibrator out of a $35,000 sex toy collection, and it’s just over $50. Shop Sassy ($54).

Uberrime Splendid Vita: Soft, beautiful, handmade. A G-spot dildo—or an art piece? The Splendid Vita’s silicone head is awesome to clench your kegel muscles around while using a clit vibe too, and the shaft bends and flexes for gentle stimulation if you prefer to thrust. Shop Splendid Vita ($69.99).

PSST! Get a Pillow Talk Sassy and Splendid Vita TOGETHER here, with slick lube. Squeezable silicone + amazing adjustable vibes + less friction, hooray. 🎉

Njoy Pure Wand: Relentless, impactful, stainless steel. And on the opposite end of the dildo firmness spectrum, the Njoy Pure Wand is weight and heft and impact. Known as the Holy Grail of G-spot dildos & renowned for making many squirt from G-spot play for the first time. Pure, polished medical-grade stainless steel that pushes in so hard, it’s impossible to miss the spot. Shop Pure Wand ($120).

Clitoral Toys

We-Vibe Melt: Sensational, comfortable, compact. Absolutely my favorite clit “suction”-style pulsator, the We-Vibe Melt is Womanizer air pulse technology. But with a more flexible mouth and a shape that curves with your body better. It’s made for fitting into penetrative sex, so it’s also easier to hold while you use a dildo or G-spot vibe vaginally. Melt can be very strong—be sure to dial it down after turning on, as it starts on speed #4 of 10. Whoa!!! Shop Melt ($149.99).

We-vibe Melt (center) feels so smooth ‘n’ streamlined compared to the bulk and weight of the (now-classic) Satisfyer Pro 2. Pic with the VixSkin Mustang in tie-bright.
✅ OMG: the We-Vibe Melt also comes bundled with the Pillow Talk Sassy! I engineered this one because I use them all the time together (and apart) and it’s so, so much good stimulation. Being able to separate the toys and use each alone (or during sex with a partner), or to combine each with other toys you own, makes the pair more versatile than a combined dual-stim toy—the downside being that you may need to use two hands sometimes when you’re employing both Sassy and Melt together.

Magic Wand Rechargeable: Classic, revamped and cordless. The Magic Wand Rechargeable’s 4 steady speeds have a beautiful progression from low to high. Unlike the OG Magic Wand, the Rechargeable’s head is nonporous silicone that does not stain or yellow with time. Slightly less strong than the corded Magic Wands, but very much a power vibrator—for anyone who doesn’t mind holding its foot-long length while feeling those vibrations carry. 🙌 Shop MW Rechargeable ($129.99).

BMS Essential Bullet: Simple, well-priced, convenient. IMO the best cheap, simple clit vibe option because it’s suprisingly strong for the price: only $21. The Essential Bullet is very compact, so it’s easy to travel with or to fit into other kinds of sex. Shop Essential Bullet ($21).

Blended Pleasure: G-Spot & Clit

Beso Plus: Popular shape, flexible, affordable. This toy gets rave reviews for creating hard orgasms, with the clit-pulse-sucking and vibration. I had that Tracy’s Dog Clit Sucking toy…and could not get it to work for me. The Beso Plus looks similar, but it’s quieter, its vibes are slightly rumblier, the G-spot arm is more flexible, and it’s not sold on Amazon (important for safety). Shop Beso Plus ($49.99).

Voodoo Beso Plus review glamour shot

We-Vibe Nova 2: Ruuumbly, soft & comfy, reliable. Hellooo!, the only “rabbit” vibrator I feel called to use 3+ times per week! The We-Vibe Nova 2 is even better than the original Nova and absolutely the best option for anyone who likes thrusting their dual-stim vibrator. That clit arm is so very flexible: like a wide finger that’s emitting deep, rumbling vibrations and keep contact with my clit even as I move Nova 2’s handle to massage my G-spot. Huge, huge congratulations to We-Vibe for making new Nova softer silicone, and increasing the shaft flexibility too. This really is a rabbit for all anatomies. Shop Nova 2 ($149).

Lush Gia: Versatile, good power, great for the undecided. Can’t decide between a G-spot and clit toy, and don’t want to spend for both? The Lush Gia by Blush is a two-ended vibe that’s reversible. You get a moderately strong wand (I say “moderately” because whoa, some wands are real strong) head on one end. Then the G-spot side has rumblier, gentler vibration (3 steady speeds). Flip ’em back and forth to vary your stimulation: you can also use the G-spot side for clit, of course! Shop Lush Gia ($59.99).

Anal & Prostate

Oxballs Ergo: Squishy, comfy, STRETCH. Great for making a day at work more interesting? The Oxballs Ergo is an awesomely filling design. The Smoke version is squishiest (which is most popular for big anal stretching), vs. the Blueballs & Platinum Swirl versions being a tad firmer (still soft compared to most non-handmade plugs; Oxballs are poured in California). These are all platinum silicone, nonporous for safe long-term wear. Shop Oxballs Ergos (5 sizes, $32.00 to $96.99).

The front tab of the anchor base is a bit larger than the back one, to give your perineum some love.

Pure Wand: Prostate. Milking. Pressure. Known for G-, designed for P-. Rub that spot so good with the 1.5 inch bulb… or go smaller if you’re just getting into anal. Either way, the Pure Wand’s curve builds pressure like crazy with the weight of the steel. Shop Pure Wand ($120).

SquarePegToys Egg Plugs Comfort, long-term wear, + *respect*. SquarePegToys’ Eggs (9 different sizes) are nothing but a phenomenon, you gotta try them if you like anal. The sizes are progressively spaced for sizing up, in ideal increments for moving from one plug size to the next one. SquarePegToys was the first maker of SuperSoft platinum silicone—by far the most comfortable and safest big sex toy material. You also gotta check out Leo for ass thrusting… Or Slink if you want to go deep, see what it’s like to pass through the second sphincter. Shop SquarePeg Toys here (Egg Plugs $29 to $159 depending on your size choice).

SquarePegToys Egg Plugs all sizes Bronze
Egg Plugs in SquarePegToys’s trademark Bronze SuperSoft, the first squishy-soft silicone used in sex toy manufacturing.

Neo Elite 7.5 and 7.5 Inch with Balls: Simple, realistic, suction-cup. Popular dildo shapes, in dual-density silicone (that’s not VixSkin-expensive). Dual-density gives a more realistic feel because it’s soft like skin, but then the firm core keeps the shaft from feeling flaccid. These are really popular as everyday, all-purpose dildos. They’ve got suction cups too: the 7.5 Inch’s is quite strong and stays on my shower wall great. Full comparison of the 7.5-Inchers (Glow vs. original) here. Shop all Neo Elite ($29.95 to $35.99).

Lovense Edge: Power, long-distance control, awesome massage. The best vibrating prostate massager, if you do like good power. Controlling Lovnese toys remotely is really hot, and the app is amazingly well-done. Texts, voice messages, and video chat are all possible within, and you can choose to give any particular partner permanent control over your device (or not). Edge has an adjustable plug section for better individual positioning, and a big “canoe” shape that can be rocked back and forth on: I’m told it’s great for rocking and pressure but not for wearing around all day (like the popular Lovense Lush 2 might be). Shop Edge ($99 – $119) & other Lovense app control vibes here.

Vedo Bump Plus: Remote, high-speed, easily wearable. This is a strong plug with a tapered shape, so it goes in more easily.1 The plus part?: it’s remote controlled (always great for anal), and the speed-change button in the plug base is recessed so you don’t change functions accidentally when you sit / rock on Bump Plus. You’re in for high-pitched power here. Shop Bump Plus ($60.99).

LUBE, Please

Simply Hybrid Jelle by Wicked: Thick, slick, easy to clean. I’m recommending this lube all over the place these days. (2020’s been rough, but at least my thrusting experience is more padded?!) Hybrid Jelle’s “no drip formula” claim is no lie: this lube is so thick that it does not slide off sex toys post-application if you’re not careful. Shop Hybrid Jelle here ($13.99).

I also recommend Simply Aqua Jelle for less-hardcore thrusting, and general use with clit vibrators and G-spot vibrators. It’s most like a natural vaginal wetness.

Penis Toys

Perfect Fit rings: Precise penis sizing. Dick size varies widely, so why are cock ring sizes so standardized? You’re SOL for a great fit if you’re not in the average-range. With Perfect Fit, it’s helpful to measure around your dick with a flexible tape measure (the sewing variety, costs a couple bucks) or a string and a ruler: then check out the sizing table included in the product listing and go just slightly smaller. Getting the right size helps trap the blood in your penis comfortably, so you feel harder and stay harder longer. Shop Perfect Fit: multi-size packs here, or choose your exact size here.

Oxballs rings & stretchers: Blubbery, fleshy, package-pushing. Oxballs squishy silicone “melds to your meat,” in their thick silicone rings. They’ll also trap blood in and keep you harder.2 but are fine for longer wear too, because they’re not as constricting. I like the ones that push a cock and balls up, for more bulge, like “Grip” and “Hung” padded rings. And Oxballs ballstretchers push the nutsack down, if you (and your partner?) like the dangly look and/or ball play. Shop Oxballs rings & stretchers by popularity here ($22 to $46).

Fun Factory Manta: Flippy-tipped stroking aid & blowjob tool. With Fun Factory’s resonating vibes, Manta’s taco-shaped wings flip back and forth: turn it sideways and target the corona (ridge) or the frenulum, stroke it up and down, or hold it underneath the base of the shaft while your partner sucks your head and upper shaft. Shop Manta ($139.99).

Gettin’ Tied Up: BDSM

Think you’re not kinky? Maybe you just haven’t tried a little bondage, submission, or impact play in the right mood with the right person, because BDSM play can be terribly erotic.

Blush Noir line: A set of matching accessories (sold separately), from blindfold to crop and nipple clamps and more. Wearing a blindfold is so good for helping you focus on feelings, and what your partner is telling you to do… Also check out the Sportsheets Midnight Lace blindfold or cuffs for a cute look.

Kinky Me Softly: 2 sets of adjustable cuffs, a blindfold, nipple clamps, a little tassel whip, and more packed together in a matching travel case, for under $50. Really nice as a first bondage kit.

Under the Bed restraints: A classic, easy-to-use restraint system. You can use the wrist and ankle cuffs separately (like just the wrist cuffs) or together, or put the straps under your bed so one person is fully tied down. Once you’ve done it a few times, you can put together this full setup super-fast (a couple minutes or less), or simply leave the straps under your bed so you can get bound with no advance planning.

Premade Gift Sets

Womanizer + We-Vibe kits: These are both awesome premium brands, with much-loved products. Womanizer and We-Vibe now have two thuddy & rumbly combo kits:

Leveling UP

These are awesome sex discoveries I’ve made this year that don’t fit into any other category.

The Layer: Worry-free play. I’ve needed this waterproof blanket for years—no more dripping on towels while sexing it up. Works whether you’re spilling lube, period blood, semen, or squirt. Rinse after use if you get it messy, then just throw it in your washer and dryer. Shop The Layer here ($59.99). I ALWAYS use my Layer under my thrusting machines, as follows…

Maia Max + Boneyard Meaty sheath: Vibrating, realistic, thrusting. This combo appeals to me more and more, as the Meaty sheath is almost right-on the firmness of an erect cock head and delivers some nice G-spot pressure. With a little lube inside, it slides easily on the Maia Max/Monroe thrusters, which vibrate too! You grip the toy’s handle, and it jerks itself in and out. Be forewarned, it is not quiet and the thrusting is more prone to stalling with hard use than a full-sized sex machine (since you’re paying a fifth the price of a good starter machine). The Maia Max is suitable for anal, including suction cupped hands-free play. Shop Meaty here, and Maia thruster here.

Maia Max Thruster thrusting dildo Boneyard Meaty realistic cock extender (2)

Kink Power Banger: Convenient, stronger thrusting—easy to move, hide, and angle. This is what I call one helluva gift. LORD this small sex machine is simple to set up and to move around, plus positioning it at the angle I want is a snap with the fully adjustable thrust arm. At over 2 inches thrust length and 195 strokes per minute, plus it goes as long as you want, it’s a more intense experience than 99% of penis-wielding humans and well-priced for the intensity it delivers.3 Dildo is not included, but the Vac setup lets you pick from an array of soft, fleshy, 100% platinum silicone options from American brands like SquarePeg and Hankey’s: My favorite soft dildo sold separately here! Shop Power Banger ($399.99).

Fantasy Dildos

You thought I was joking about the monster dildos mentioned in the first paragraph above? Nope! Fantasy / indie makers create unique toys in beautiful colors, really delightful to look at; and all the textures are a fun change of pace from a standard dick-shaped dildo.

A new find for me is Paladin Pleasure Sculptors, who does the most inspiring rainbow marbles: only $25 extra added onto any toy and always available. (No waiting for stock drops.) One Twitter comment when I posted my Titan seen here was “Holy mother of Lisa Frank!” and yup, I do love to see that bright-colored explosion emerging from my vulva.

I also love both Pleasure Forge and Strange Bedfellas, and shop with them because I respect their artistry and how (1) polished, (2) colorful, and (3) creative the toys are. Pleasure Forge has more semi-phallic designs (my jam), so I’m building quite the collection. While Strange Bedfellas is more monstrous: I just got a Ziq monster claw plug for creeper’s sake and to grind off on the base, and bought a friend an Ohdan fang + tongue dildo as a sculpture and discussion piece. (Maybe she’ll use it too?)


As always, sex toys are amazing tools, whether you’re playing alone or with a partner. They’re gadgets we can use to spice up our erotic lives, and often bring stronger orgasms too.

Buying new toys is an exploration, and adventure, and nothing is perfect for everyone—so ask yourself what you’re looking for before you buy, and feel free to shoot me an email at if you’re looking for more direction.


  1. Assuming you have a bit of anal experience: this plug is average size at 1.5 inches maximum diameter, so anyone who’s new to anal will likely find it big. Start with a Mood Naughty Kit if that’s you.
  2. For most penises, ones that aren’t comparatively narrow or way girthy.
  3. Yes, there are more powerful machines, if you’re someone who wants 6 inches of stroke length pummeling your ass in and out, in and out. They’re also larger and more wobbly on a bed.

Leave a Comment