A very fantastical new sex toy maker has caught my attention: they’re called the Love Smiths! Look at these guys ⬆️⬆️, aren’t the colors spectacular? The Love Smiths’ sex toys are super craft-wise too: they’re polished, blemish-free, soft and yielding platinum silicone. This Love Smiths review covers the Troll dildo and my vaginal (with a bit of anal) experience; plus the Dwarf Masturbator for penis!
The Love Smiths (all products here) are French-based, so especially if you’re European and a fantasy toy fan, take note! It’s hard to argue with less shipping cost and no chance of getting slammed by customs fees.
Keep reading for info about these soft-silicone toys…and for lots of pics, because it’s hard not to pile those on when reviewing toys this attractive!
Contents
Love Smiths Troll Dildo
Trolls are clearly very gnarly creatures. The amount of texture the Love Smiths have added on the Troll dildo’s shaft and ballsack: truly fantastic.
They tell me some people find ultra-realistic dildos off-putting,1 so the Troll is humanoid (partly) but definitely not lifelike. My favorite parts: the patterning down the Troll’s backside, plus the scaly balls.
I picked the Troll for its triple corona, though: it’s got not just one head ridge, but THREE! That kind of repeated horizontal line can be great while thrusting or riding. A nice addition to the movement. I selected the medium size, and the 00-50 silicone. This is the color from the Ulele campaign; it will added to the Love Smiths’ website and called the “Heroic” coloration after October 22.
Mmm… I like the Troll’s three ridges going in, they’re a gently stimulating texture. The Troll’s head is definitely the smallest part of the toy! The dildo really gets chunkier halfway down the shaft, where it expands into these plates—three of those too, all with two raised bumps at their bottom.
The bumps rub, rub, at the front of my opening when I’m taking this toy vaginally. The Troll’s top half is so flexible (in 00-50 silicone, mine is), that the closely packed plates (and their dual dots!) dominate the sensations I’m receiving… Highly stimulating, so much that I want to turn the Troll around after a few minutes, to enjoy the Troll’s flatter back textures.
And that’s how the magic happens with me and the Troll.2 The Troll’s more broadly bumpy back plates feel best rubbing against the front of my vagina… With the more “caterpillar-esque” protrusions comfortable against the ass-facing side of my pelvic floor.
The Troll’s three coronal ridges are going deep, pressing up into my posterior fornix…
And the Troll balls. Yessssss. They’re scaly too, dragon-like. Perfect for grinding my vulva on. This is how the Troll and I work so well together. The balls are flatter too, not difficult to sit on. And they’re an ideal width so they fit between my outer labia…spreading me just a little.
Rubbing on the Troll, sitting on its length, with all those smooth textures, and the balls to finally get me off. It sure doesn’t hurt that I can see their gorgeous marbled purple between my legs while I’m doing it.
This riding and grinding is easy because of the suction cup base! It’s a large cavity, that you press down to force out the air inside and create a strong seal. It even stuck on my computer tower that has a sharp ridge down the middle! (For display purposes only 😄⬇️)
I would recommend the Troll’s suction cup on an inner bathtub/shower corner, if you’re luckily enough to have a larger one like I now do—to brace my back against!
Since the Troll’s head isn’t big at all—smaller than average penis size—I got to thinking while I was rubbing my pelvic floor against it. The bottom of the base was making my butthole tingly too… So I had try the Troll anally as well! The head diameter is right about 1.25 inches diameter (my bad, ≈ 3.2 cm), and it’s 10 cm circumference around at the first ridge. That’s slimmer, particularly for a fantasy toy.
The slickness of Love Smiths’ silicone is so helpful for me anally. The Troll has a ton of texture, but the silicone finish is super-smooth, slick, not matte. So I lubed up the Troll’s shiny head sufficiently, and gripped it mid-shaft, to stop its flexible silicone from folding over.
The tri-ridge design offers a lot of sensation around the anus, going in and moving gently. The bump-bump-bumps rub oh-so-softly. Definitely something to make you wet? I enjoy clitoral stimulation with my anal, and holding Troll in while using my We-Vibe Melt was awesome.
Love Smiths Dwarf Masturbator
It’s so good that we’re seeing more silicone penis toys, because silicone is much easier to maintain. TPE/TPR, the traditional stroker material till recently, lets mold grow and bacteria reproduce when you don’t clean it thoroughly after use and dry well.3
The Love Smiths’ silicone penis masturbators are sturdy, more hygienic, and tear resistant with how the sleeve is thicker. They’re made of 00-20 Shore silicone, the softest you can mold sex toys from.
The Dwarf here has a big clit, tiny inner labia, and a small urethra. (As a woman I appreciate the last part, it’s tragic thinking about a creature that can’t properly expel waste.) It’s sized well for average to a bit above average penises, and longer ones too. The Love Smiths say about the Dwarf’s size:
This toy has an exterior diameter of 7 cm (max) and a length of 18 cm (max). The hole of the toy has a minimum hole diameter of 1.7 cm (0.8 inches). This masturbator is good for penises up to 14 cm (5.5 inches) of the circumference. Above that, it will start to feel tight.
—Dwarf product page
And the inside…it’s ripple-lined, for that stimulation, and a lil tighter on both ends, with more wide space in the very center of the masturbator. How does it feel to stick your dick in?, I’m sure you want to know.
2020’s an odd year, so I handed the Dwarf off to my ex4 after I finished photographing it. I’ll let him give you a few words.
I’ve used Fleshlights before, so I’m used to a large cannister-size toy. This was shorter but not much, and about as wide as a Fleshlight top after I put myself in. It is soft but not quite that soft. It doesn’t fold over on itself.
The ribs at the opening are the part I feel most. The tightest. In the center it is more open for an inch maybe, but then it tightens some to stimulate under my ridge when I put my full length in. Just under the head, more stimulation.
I would say to use a lot of lube to make this comfortable, because of the silicone and the ridges. Once you squirt lube all the way down inside, and lube the penis up too. Then it starts to feel good.
The “Dwarf” gets wider when I put myself in, you may want to use short strokes at first. Then I move to using both hands around it when going faster.
The open end is good because you’re not slamming into anything. And also to run water through at the end. I thought the Dwarf sleeve expanded well for me to use comfortably, then I push it open after I’m done to reach my fingers in when there is water running through.
Last, the clit was different than any toys I have seen. Large definitely, and it tapped lightly above my penis when I was using it one way, or it would press a little into my balls if turned upside down. It is the softest part of this sleeve, so it didn’t poke. The extra stimulation was interesting.
Overall it’s really interesting to use when you’re looking for more feeling than just your hand, and it’s good that I don’t need to corn-starch it and look out for mold.
More about Love Smiths Fantasy Toys
Indie sex toys are real-life art. So it makes sense that they’re more expensive (to a greater or lesser degree depending on the brand) than mass-produced toys.
With the Love Smiths you are getting a handmade item, you know you’re supporting a small business (rather than a company who pays workers low wages in China), and you can see exactly who created the toys if you’d like.5
Obviously, as a European shop, they’ll be better for EU-based buyers who are often hit with customs fees; and always by higher shipping costs, when buying American toys. Fantasy dildos are a very American genre, in general, with most of the big names and so many smaller brands being in the States.
The Love Smiths are based in Grenoble, France; and were scientists and researchers prior to jumping into the Love Smiths as a full-time gig. All their products are high-quality platinum silicone, with safe pigments added.
Other big perks: they’re highly inclusive, with multiple FTM clit strokers; as well as more silicone penis masturbators than anyone (besides that dragon company).
The packaging is also eco-friendly / recyclable as well as discreet: plain brown boxes secured with sturdy paper tape, filled with corn-based packing peanuts, compostable cellophane wrappers, and of course your silicone toy(s) with paper instruction sheet.
The Love Smiths also give a crazy amount of detailing about each product and its sizing; like I love how the cross-sections for the penis toys make the insides more understandable.
Overall Thoughts
The Love Smiths make great quality products, with Phallophile-approved silicone. And colors! Their toys allow the standard soft firmness options and beautiful color schemes you should expect from a fantasy toymaker. And the Love Smiths are Euro-based!
I love how they take pride in producing grade-A pleasure products: these are slick toys without mold marks or flaws. Polished really is the best word to describe them. And also intriguing, with the amount of different textures you get to choose from.
Browse the Love Smiths’ home site here.
NOTES
- I love disembodied cocks, man, send ’em my way every day. But also enjoy extra textures for a change of pace, or during those cyclical times when I’m less sensitive.
- Doh, that sentence would’ve sounded amazing if this toy was named “Wizard” or similar!
- You can put cornstarch on it to absorb moisture, people often claim that improves lifespan, but then you have to deal with that white dusty powder and still needing to clean immediately. It is not hygienic to wait till the next morning to clean a TPE stroker, for example.
- Along with our children, why not, he and I see each other biweekly for the hand-off. Dwarf hidden away discreetly, of course. It’s his now!
- Please don’t be a dick when ordering / reviewing indie toys. It is not their fault that the postal carrier lost your package, first of all; nor can they be blamed if you didn’t (a) read the size specifications carefully, or (b) understand the different shore durometer levels. Ask before buying if you have questions, they will be happy to help.
F****** finally! I was always really sad that almost all fantasy sex toys are from the US and we Europeans have to pay for transatlantic shipping. These ones look really awesome and I definitely have to try them out!