Review: T.O.M. (The Other Man) v.2 Mount

I’ve reviewed a lot of suction cup dildos in the last year. I’ve also told you all about my adventures in sticking them all over my house. But until about six weeks ago, I had yet to try the popular T.O.M. suction cup dildo mount, which is now on its second version. Would T.O.M. v. 2 be a worthwhile addition to my hands-free explorations?

Comfort and Height Concerns

The T.O.M. mount is right around 7″ tall, so taller than some torsos are high when lying flat. But…an actual person has hips, right? And with T.O.M., there’s really nothing to rest my weight on when I’m mounting a dildo on the top surface. T.O.M.’s top section is, well…boxy, so I don’t enjoy grinding my ass against it. That’s why I prefer that the dildos I mount on top of it: (1) be longer than average or (2) have balls that keep my butt cheeks from hitting those back corners.

My Favorite vs. the T.O.M. Dildo Mount

I mentioned T.O.M.’s hard plastic corners hitting: After a year or two, I got more annoyed with that, so now I am thrilled 🥳❗ to have found a cozier set-up.

You gotta get this thigh harness, you just strap it around a slim pillow, and voila! you can stack more pillows under that, till you get whatever height your legs need. The best part, there’s no hard box I bang into if I start feelin’ the need to ride hard.

This mount also comes bundled with IMO the best lifelike average-thickness dildo – though I like wide peens, so I usually stick the Extra-Extra-Large Solina Mega ultra-realistic on top.

My First T.O.M. Mount Trials

My first trials resulted in two favorite dildo picks for mounting on top of T.O.M. I will only use body-safe platinum silicone dildos (unlike most dildos you’ll find on Amazon, where it’s hard to tell what’s what, because so many Chinese vendors there lie about materials). And I do not want a bacteria-laden dildo inside me.

I was OK with a shorter (5″ length) dildo on T.O.M. mount: it was pretty good riding on top. But then, I tried the ColourSoft 8″, which I absolutely love stuck to a particular wall in my house, on top of T.O.M.—but the length was just a bit much for me, like it was ramming my cervix. This brings me to my next point: height.

If you have long legs (or are a guy wanting an anal mount!), a taller mount may be more your speed.

I’ve scoured all the Amazon reviews of T.O.M., looking for people’s opinions on why the mount worked or didn’t work for them. Now, a good number of these reviews don’t give any particular reason for why the buyer wrote, “Works as advertised,” “Great,” or “Don’t waste your money.”

But I did notice a pattern: shorter folks (like one woman who said she was 5’2″) seem to have a problem using the top mount comfortably. In contrast, people who identify as taller women (like maybe 5’7″ and up) have problems with the angled side mounts. I agree, because I cannot use the two angled sides without sticking a pillow under T.O.M. But, I put a flatter pillow under T.O.M., and then I can move my 5’8″ frame back and forth for some doggy-style screwing. It’s decent, though I don’t really love it.

My T.O.M. Self-Thrusting Experience

I got into self-thrusting dildos after I first wrote this review. Some are mini fucking machines that do all the motion for you. So I was pretty excited when I finally got one with a good suction cup, the Maia Max Thrusting Vibrator. But Max (and its purple version, Monroe) are so abstract, and my vag wants realistic.

Enter the Velvet Thruster, a handheld mini sex machine with a suction base. Turns out, the mini version, Teddy, is the best when I mount it on top of T.O.M. Pull out some long-lasting lube, put a few pillows in front of T.O.M. for me to brace myself against, and I’m getting screwed for half an hour, easy, with basically no effort on my part. YES. Find a video of Teddy thrusting while stuck to T.O.M. on my YouTube!

T.O.M. for Double Penetration

I’m not going to keep you waiting any longer: it’s time to talk about the obvious when you hear the phrase “the other man”: a threesome. In this case, the three parties were me, the Solina dildo on T.O.M., and my husband. First I tried sticking the dildo on top of the mount, positioning myself, and of course presenting my ass. Once he was in, it was…OK.

As he pressed his weight into me from behind, I spread my legs more, and my thighs started to hit the rounded corners.

So I tried the side angles instead, again with a pillow under T.O.M., and that was even worse. Afterward, I realized that T.O.M.’s included chart (#7 below) shows the giver straddled over the mount, rather than the receiver (me). We tried again, with him directly over T.O.M. and a dildo on the less-steeply-angled side…still no luck. Getting the right angles is hard! Maybe if I had a partner who was more flexible, we’d be able to pull this position off, but as it is, I’d much rather use T.O.M. for single penetration. I can still live out my “other man” fantasies, more comfortably, by making my husband watch as I use a dildo on T.O.M.

Other Positions

And as for the other listed positions:

1. On my knees. Like I said earlier, the top section works best for me when I use a softer dildo, to simulate cowgirl style riding. I prefer to be on a bed so I can spread my legs more comfortably and have padding for my knees. The angled sides, in contrast, are the way to go for doggy simulation. I’ve never been able to get the more-steeply-angled side to work for me, but the one with the gentler slope is much better. Actually, I most enjoy arching my shoulders back being upright, so I’m not resting my weight on my hands, for a sort of modified doggy. That way, my ass is directly resting on T.O.M. and it’s easier to grind. This position also provides easier access to my clit since my arms aren’t supporting my weight.
2. On back, butt toward T.O.M. This is awful for me. I can’t get any thrusting rhythm going. I guess it probably works better for people who like clenching around their dildos instead of riding them?
3. Two people on their backs. Haven’t tried it, since this position seems more geared toward vaginal use and I don’t have any female partners.
4. Two people on their knees. Again, full disclosure, I haven’t tried this one, but I figure height differences could cause a problem. Also, legs in the way.
5. “On knees while oral,” as the instructions call it. The BJ giver will have to be good at sexual multitasking, and…I’m not. I cannot get my thrusting and sucking rhythms to line up so we’re both being pleasured effectively. You may need to be an acrobat to pull this spit roast off effectively. We found that the blowjob receiver will need a good stack of pillows behind them—or else be willing to push their weight forward.
6. Sitting on top of the mount/squatting. I tried sitting on top of the mount, and again, there wasn’t enough padding for my ass. As for squatting, like in a “froggy style” position, it’s OK for a short time. It requires some strength in the quads, for sure. Even though my legs are muscular, I still think this position is more effort than it’s worth—it’s super hard for me to get off this way. It does provide a lot of access to my clit, though. Maybe use it for forced orgasms?
7. DP, described above. Didn’t work for us; might be better for you.
8. On knees with exercise ball. I don’t own an exercise ball, but most of the ones I’ve seen were too tall to make this position seem really workable for me while using the angled sides. With the top mount, I can imagine it being better. In lieu of an exercise ball, I’ve gripped a low shelf while riding T.O.M., and that gave me more momentum. I do like speed toward the end, so thumbs up.

Stability and the Weight Attachment System Tray

The most common complaint about T.O.M. is that it moves around while you’re using it. When I push my weight against T.O.M.’s angled sides, I find that it rocks maybe half an inch upward (off the pillow I have it on, for more height) on the upstroke. If you really want T.O.M. to stay put, then you can get a plastic tray insert called the Weight Attachment System (or W.A.S., for short).

When I was trying DP with my partner, it was hard getting the positioning right, so sticking some weight in the tray helped. If you’re really looking to put on a show for your lover, then I suggest the weight tray because having to keep your weight pressed down on T.O.M. distracts from the fun.

Personally, for solo masturbation, I’m fine without the W.A.S. I do like to use the top mount most of all, and in that position, my body weight holds the mount in place.

I’ve found that T.O.M.’s four plastic “feet” stick well to flat surfaces like tile and wood flooring—as long as I don’t rock too hard back and forth or lean forward a lot. I usually use T.O.M. on my bed for knee support, and the feet also grip my sheets OK. Again, when I use the angled sides, there’s a rocking motion that I don’t find too distracting, but that you might.

A couple final notes on the W.A.S.: if you separate the tray from the main body of T.O.M., it’s good to do so gently, because a lot of force can cause the tabs to snap off. Also, weights aren’t included with the W.A.S., so…you have to look for those on your own.

T.O.M. vs. Liberator Mounts

T.O.M. isn’t the only dildo holder on the market, so I’d be remiss if I didn’t compare it to another popular option, the Liberator toy mounts: specifically the Wing (mini review here). These are handmade, high-density foam mounts that don’t sink down when you put your weight on them.

Both mounts have their own advantages. For doggy and other rear-entry positions, T.O.M. is definitely easier to use because of the angled sides. Also, T.O.M. lets you get absolutely the full length of your dildo when it’s on the flat top surface, whereas the Liberator pillows’ holes swallow up at least half an inch of usable length. Plus, if you’re looking to use the dildo’s balls for clit or perineum stimulation, T.O.M. makes that so much easier since they’re not hidden in a fabric pocket.

But, in my experience, the Wing (or BonBon) is hands-down the winner for comfort if you’re looking for cowgirl riding only. This is assuming you’re not shorter than average, because the Liberator mounts are a few inches taller than T.O.M. With the right-sized dildo, my Wing is amazing to really ride. It gives me a place to rest my ass and takes the weight off my knees better than T.O.M. (which I don’t like sitting on). The Wing’s dense foam is cushy, but also supports my full weight.

There is a price difference: T.O.M. is now $50 USD, versus over $90 for the Wing (or $68 for the BonBon). If you feel like you’re going to need the T.O.M.’s weight attachment system, though, then that’s actually more expensive ($49.99 + $21.99 = $71.98) than the Liberator BonBon—and that’s assuming that you don’t buy separate weights to hold the W.A.S. tray down. Because of the even price points, I’d recommend making your choice based on T.O.M.’s other features rather than cost alone.

On Buying from Amazon

T.O.M. is sold on Amazon, but as an advocate of body-safe toys, I have to warn you that it can be extremely risky to buy your insertable toys (including dildos, plugs, and vibes) from Amazon. Please don’t just trust any random seller who says their dildo is body-safe. For example, it’s a bald-faced lie that that Anfei dildo you’re looking at on Amazon is FDA approved, because the FDA doesn’t regulate sex toy safety. Overall, it’s much safer to buy insertable toys from trustworthy retailers, because unsafe dildos can and do cause bacterial infections, irritation, and even chemical burns in some cases.

Also, silicone is the ONLY body-safe option for suction cup dildos. PVC, jelly, “Ultraskyn,” TPR, and other “realistic feel” materials are porous, can’t be sanitized, and may include toxic chemicals. It’s also important to understand that phthalates are not the only chemicals you have to worry about, and condoms do not make unsafe toys OK to use. Because of these serious concerns, I’ve worked hard to make a complete listing of body-safe suction cup toys that are 100% definitely platinum silicone. I also understand that cost is a very real factor for many of us, but body-safe toys do not have to be expensive.

Overall Thoughts

I think T.O.M. offers lots of awesome opportunities for exploration. You’ll probably need to do some experimenting to figure out what works best for you. At first I gravitated toward the setup that best simulates my favorite position, cowgirl. But then I determined that, when I want to use a dildo doggy style, T.O.M. was the best suction cup mount out there, without a doubt. Because my legs are(apparently) kinda long for a woman, I did have to put a pillow underneath T.O.M. to get extra height on the side mounts—but that’s an easy fix. And T.O.M. turned out to be better than my previous fave doggy setup.

T.O.M. isn’t perfect for everyone—some people have problems with the height. I now 1000% prefer my comfy Solina mount+pillows for cowgirl.

Interested? Check out the T.O.M. dildo mount here.

You can also pick up the Weight Attachment System tray here.

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