Review: Uberrime Essential Gentleman Handmade Silicone Dildo

I love writing reviews for small, indie sex toy makers. These are individuals who have a passion for producing unique, handmade, body-safe items. They’re creative and hard-working and intelligent—they have to be, because there’s no dildo-making class out there that will teach you everything you need to know. Instead, it takes trial and error, and lots of time and expense, to create a product that’s safe, usable, and attractive.

With that in mind, I was pretty surprised to discover how professional Uberrime Dildo’s toys looked after I happened upon the Etsy shop a couple months back. One of Uberrime’s newest offerings is the Essential Gentleman, a semi-phallic dildo that’s available in five metallic colors for only $40,1 or in a two-color marble for $50.Uberrime Dildos Essential Gentleman Splendid Gentleman full length

The Essential Gent has a nice forward curve and a (slightly) bulbous head—essential G-spotting qualities. And in the marbled metallic blue, it’s very attractive. I wanted to love it.

But I have a confession: I usually like my vaginal stim to be more pronounced—so I can’t help but prefer the Splendid Gentleman to the Essential that I received at the same time.

Uberrime Dildos Essential Gentleman Splendid Gentleman comparison

Two dildos: so similar, but so different.

The Splendid’s bigger coronal ridge just rubs me the right way (and it’s dual-density, y’all). But every now and then,2 I do want a toy that’s smooth and easy to use. I can’t ride the tentacle monster all the time, ya know. 😉 Then, the Essential is better because it’s gentle yet not boring. (No offense to anyone who does like smooth, plain toys.) The oval-shaped head combines with the forward curve to create some nice pressure.

The Essential’s second ridge adds a little kick, and then comes the flat area between the two vertical ridges running up from the base. I like this flat surface because it’s about the width of a smaller finger—so it gives me a very gentle fingering-type effect externally.Uberrime Dildos Essential Gentleman Splendid Gentleman shaft texture

To add to the gliding, the silicone has a smooth matte finish. It’s slick but not glossy, with a touch of drag. The Essential Gentleman’s default firmness is a medium (10A shore). Personally, I think this is just right for an average, less textured dildo. It bends a little, so those who need firmer pressure (along the lines of Tantus flexible toys, or Fun Factory dildos) might not find it suits their needs. But I find that the hint of squish adds to the Essential Gentleman’s mild-yet-not-dull nature.

An interesting thing is that the base is slick enough on the bottom to stick to flat surfaces—kinda. It’s not a great suction cup choice if you’re looking to really ride or thrust fast. But it will stick to plastic/wood/tile if you’re sitting on it and maybe even rocking slowly. The base is also wider than many silicone dildos of this girth. That makes it more stable in a harness, or if you’re wanting to sit on the toy and take its full length. But because my hands aren’t large, I find it a bit difficult to grip while thrusting—a minor inconvenience I have with a number of toys (like the Vixen Large Realistic Bent).Uberrime Dildos Essential Gentleman Splendid Gentleman base

All in all, I would highly recommend the Essential Gentleman to anyone looking for a semi-realistic, artisan dildo—especially one that won’t cost them an arm and a leg. The shape manages to be both gentle (because of the smoothness) and stimulating (because of the head and the forward curve). I might not think it’s amazing as a pure G-spotting toy, but it works admirably with a good bullet vibe.

You can check out the single-color Essential Gentleman here, or go for more color (120 possible combinations!) for another $10.

Uberrime sent me this dildo in exchange for an honest review. I’ll always tell you when I think something is cheaply made, or when I think it’s OK but it happens to not work for my body.

  1. There are cheaper silicone dildos, it’s true, but they’re typically Chinese-made and in flat colors. (And usually very realistic.) A few exceptions are (1) the Funkit NoFrillDos, which are quality, but none of the shapes lend themselves to G-spot stimulation, IMO; and (2) a few of the smaller Vixen and Tantus dils seen here.
  2. Read: it’s a better period dildo for me.

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Editor, writer, introvert, hedonist, and lover of all the finer things in life—including lots of high-quality sex toys.

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