Review: Uberrime Essential Handmade Silicone Dildo

I love writing reviews for small, indie sex toy makers. These are individuals who have a passion for producing unique, handmade, body-safe items. They’re creative and hard-working and intelligent—they have to be, because there’s no dildo-making class out there that will teach you everything you need to know. Instead, it takes trial and error, and lots of time and expense, to create a product that’s safe, usable, and attractive.

With that in mind, I was pretty surprised to discover how professional Uberrime Dildo’s toys looked after I happened upon the Etsy shop a couple months back. One of Uberrime’s newest offerings is the Essential, a semi-phallic dildo that’s available in a number of truly gorgeous marble colorations. Note: My Essential, pictured in this review, is only one color—but check out how awesome a four-color marble looks. Uberrime Dildos Essential Gentleman Splendid Gentleman full length

The Essential has a nice forward curve and a (slightly) bulbous head—essential G-spotting qualities. And in the marbled metallic blue, it’s very attractive. I wanted to love it.

But I have a confession: I usually like my vaginal stim to be more pronounced—so I can’t help but prefer the Splendid to the Essential that I received at the same time.

Uberrime Dildos Essential Gentleman Splendid Gentleman comparison

Two dildos: so similar, but so different.

The Splendid’s bigger coronal ridge just rubs me the right way (and it’s dual-density, y’all). But every now and then,1 I do want a toy that’s smooth and easy to use. I can’t ride the tentacle monster all the time, ya know. 😉 Then, the Essential is better because it’s gentle yet not boring. (No offense to anyone who does like smooth, plain toys.) The oval-shaped head combines with the forward curve to create some nice pressure.

The Essential’s second ridge adds a little kick, and then comes the flat area between the two vertical ridges running up from the base. I like this flat surface because it’s about the width of a smaller finger—so it gives me a very gentle fingering-type effect externally.Uberrime Dildos Essential Gentleman Splendid Gentleman shaft texture

To add to the gliding, the silicone has a smooth matte finish. It’s slick but not glossy, with a touch of drag. The Essential’s default firmness is a medium (10A shore). Personally, I think this is just right for an average, less textured dildo. It bends a little, so those who need firmer pressure (along the lines of Tantus flexible toys, or Fun Factory dildos) might not find it suits their needs. But I find that the hint of squish adds to the Essential’s mild-yet-not-dull nature.

An interesting thing is that the base is slick enough on the bottom to stick to flat surfaces—kinda. It’s not a great suction cup choice if you’re looking to really ride or thrust fast. But it will stick to plastic/wood/tile if you’re sitting on it and maybe even rocking slowly. The base is also wider than many silicone dildos of this girth. That makes it more stable in a harness, or if you’re wanting to sit on the toy and take its full length. But because my hands aren’t large, I find it a bit difficult to grip while thrusting—a minor inconvenience I have with a number of toys (like the Vixen Large Realistic Bent).Uberrime Dildos Essential Gentleman Splendid Gentleman base

All in all, I would highly recommend the Essential to anyone looking for an abstract artisan dildo—especially one that won’t cost them an arm and a leg. At a little over $50 for a two-color marble, this toy isn’t the cheapest silicone dildo out there, but the marbled effect in these toys is stellar. Just as importantly, the Essential’s shape manages to be both gentle (because of the smoothness) and stimulating (because of the head and the forward curve). I might not think it’s amazing as a pure G-spotting toy, but I think the comfortable stimulation it provides will appeal to many users.

You can pick up a two-color marbled Essential from Peepshow Toys and save 10% when you use code FELICITY at checkout; or see the many different possible Essential colorations on Uberrime Dildos’ website here.

Uberrime sent me this dildo in exchange for my honest review. I’ll always tell you when I think something is cheaply made, or when I think it’s OK but it happens to not work for my body. 

  1. Read: it’s a better period dildo for me.

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